Re: s/o parenting self-talk
"It's OK to not be perfect. It's OK to not be perfect. It's really OK...."
"They won't be this age forever." "Model what you want, Ash. And later, I will give you a nice hot bath." :shifty |
Re: s/o parenting self-talk
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Re: s/o parenting self-talk
I only just discovered this thread and it has been so useful! Thank you ladies!
Slightly different idea, but I sometimes remember to turn "What punishment can I use show him that this behaviour really is unacceptable" into "How can I help him to do better?" And after I've failed yet again and I find myself caught in a useless cycle of self-berating, I remind myself, "If I were a perfect Mummy, I'd have to manufacture bad interactions so he wouldn't grow up with unrealistic expectations of his future relationships" :D |
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Re: s/o parenting self-talk
"Model what you want, Ash. And later, I will give you a nice hot bath." :shifty[/QUOTE]
Love it! Need it! :yes Now if I could just remember these! My friend, IRL and here, always has wonderful quotes... practical and inspirational... stuck up on her walls. She usually has them in her kitchen. They change as the need arises. I'm going to work on sticking up a few of these this weekend. |
Re: s/o parenting self-talk
great idea, FairOlivia, I think I'll do something similar (after the wedding and birthday party... maybe next weekend :))
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Re: s/o parenting self-talk
:sh5
if i'm perfect, whatever will they talk to their spouses about?? :shifty :lol i've got one from the past two days: "you really really want to (spank, yell, be mean) right now, and i understand, you are very angry, but think about how nice it will be to hold him tonight and recount what we did today and not feel guilty and not need to apologize over and over" :heart stops me every time |
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I really really needed to hear that tonight!!! :) |
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:cup I've gotten so much out of this thread!
I don't know if it's ok to post a link, but this article on MSN has some similar things to say: http://healthyliving.msn.com/default...e&contentId=52 |
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Oh man, I needed that today. :-/ Tomorrow is a new day. |
Re: s/o parenting self-talk
So I've finally finished writing down all these lovely ideas in my journal...
2 questions: Anyone else think this should be a sticky? and Can anyone point me to the laziness spinoff? Thanks :) |
Re: s/o parenting self-talk
Thanks for this. I have a 6 yr old & 3 yr old. With kids this age would you talk yourself through out loud or just in your head? Also, has anyone gotten to a point that you gain enough control over your reactions to not need to walk away? For now walking away would be better than staying and spewing but not sure I want to model retreat as response to stress.
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Re: s/o parenting self-talk
I talk outloud, oherwise I can't hear myself. :shifty
It's better to remove yourself than do something you regret. I see it as an aspect of self-discipline. :shrug3 |
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I've been re-parenting myself for a long time, and still find walking away to cool off is a valuable tool.
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Re: s/o parenting self-talk
i think retreat is a healthy response to stress, also modeled by Jesus himself, as long as it is not the *only* one you use. :)
i do out loud and to myself both... sometimes i do third person... esp. for processing. yesterday instead of telling dh that he needed a nap i said this: "remember how yesterday i was really crabby when i was tired? yeah, mama didn't feel good all, mama gets so grouchy when she's tired, doesn't she? and remember mama went and took a nap while you played with papa? and then she was much nicer, right?" (he nodded enthusiastically :) ) |
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