[HuggaBuggaMommy]

Originally Posted by forty-two

(as most defenses of GBD I saw were from the perspective that children are not capable of making a conscious choice to sin, and so there was no reason to need to "make them aware of their sin" in the first place, and I am more on the total depravity side of the coin), but I realized that, whatever our view of how one's sin nature affects us and our children, we as parents still can't do even a smidgeon to fix or ameliorate the effects of sin on our children's hearts. Any which way you look at it, that's God's role, not ours. We humans can't change the heart. And any parenting approach that requires it is doomed to failure.

Which is basically my answer to the question. I can't parent the sin out of my child, and I can't parent them into salvation. It is all God - making them aware of their sin, removing sin and sin guilt and saving them - and us .

This, totally.

Someone who parents punitively may *feel* like his/her discipline is getting results because of the immediate nature or pain, i.e., the kid cries, feels bad, shows remorse (because of the punishment), etc. But I've also seen, many times, children who just want to get their spanking "over with" so they can get back to playing or whatever. To them, it did nothing for the heart issue. But the mother still gave it because she thought it was Biblical and commanded, and the way a Godly mother parents.