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Old 08-07-2006, 09:36 AM   #27
CelticJourney
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Default Re: Permissiveness or GBD?

Quote:
We live in a small home, there are 7 of us, one bathroom, and three small bedrooms. This is sad and I hate to admit it but....ds sleeps in the living room, he is four, has no space of his own. DD, 19 mos, sleeps in the room with me and dh (cosleeping).... DD wants to share with the 4 y/o boy and let us keep baby in the room with us, so that she doesn't have to share with two younger sisters. (8 & 10 who share a room together already) Because, heaven forbid, her privacy be violated by the other two, they do not get along, which is one of my reasons for making them share in the first place. They need to learn how to get along and love one another and plus, well, this is terrible, but I want to prove to dd that life isn't always going to happen the way she wants it to and she just has to deal with it.
I think you need to consider changing your approach. You have made these issues a battle, rather than about life and compromise. "I want to prove.." "they need to learn.." I have a brother-in-law that I don't like and don't respect. No problem, I don't have to spend much time with him so I can be polite and patient with him when we need to interact. Now if I was force to be with him a lot, I would be bitter and angry and frustrated all the time - not condusive to 'getting to know and love each other'.

I would sit down with my dh, look at all the options, consider all the personalities and then do what you feel is best. If you feel it is most practical for the 8 and 10 yos to share a room, then so be it. It seems you are creating more stress for yourself than you are solving by making this decision about more than living space. I think if dd13 is willing to share with her 4yo brother and it works for you, that it is a great option.
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Elizabeth

"Truth without love is divisive and hurtful & love without truth is anemic"--Pastor Estep

Arise, cry out in the night...pour out your heart like water in the presence of the Lord; Lift up your hands to him for the lives of your children..; Lamentations 2:19
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