[saturnfire16]

I'm looking into this at the moment, because my husband and I are under the impression that the Bible certainly doesn't forbid physical discipline, and in fact does mention it positively a number of times ("the rod" - and we have heard the idea that the rod is metaphorical, but we don't at this time believe that because we see God choosing the word "rod" where it could have been "discipline," "authority," or whatever).

I don't believe physical discipline falls under:

Love your neighbor as yourself.
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always try to be kind to each other and to everyone else.
Be compassionate and kind to one another, forgiving each other.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

And then there's the very clear example of it being a rod used for striking in Proverbs 23:13-14: "Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, he will not die. If you strike him with the rod, you will save his soul from Sheol."

If you hit a child with a walking stick about as big around as the small end of a baseball bat, he very well could die! We've seen children die from far less (getting hit with plumbing supply line, like Lydia Schatz).

So either the Bible clearly logically and scientifically wrong or this verse isn't about physical discipline at all.

Also, most people who spank don't actually use a walking stick because it's pretty easy to see how that would be dangerous. They use a hand, maybe even a stick or wooden spoon. But if one believes that the Bible is promoting physical discipline *with a walking stick* then the appropriate thing to use would be a walking stick.

I totally get where people are coming from psychologically who think that spanking is harmful, and I expect some will be angry with me that I even bring this up, and will think that we're bad parents because we use physical discipline. But I really am searching for the true answer because I want to do the right thing for my children. I hope that makes sense!

I doubt anyone is angry with you. Many of us have been in exactly the same place with the same questions you have. I'm glad you're here!