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Originally Posted by Happygrl

If its purely a family cultural thing and the parent responds the same way each time no matter the child, then how would you explain families where one child responds one way and another responds another way?

Again, I think this statement is too much of a blanket one. In some families that may be the case. But it simply isn't true for my family and, I'm sure, for others as well.

I have one child who is far more likely to say no to a request than another child, no matter how it's worded. Certainly it's a personality thing.

But, like Mommy Piadosa says, I think it's unreasonable for me to have to be rude in order to get my child to comply with a request. Every child is probably going to test and challenge requests at some point.

I have one child who will argue and question unless I yell or speak in a very stern tone. But to me it does not feel right to then always yell every time I want her to do something. I prefer to teach her to comply without my having to yell at her or be harsh to get results.

Likewise, I expect my children to respond to a polite request without my having to be rude to get them to do what I ask.

Some people don't feel that saying please is polite or that not saying please is rude. In the culture I grew up in, saying please is being polite, and giving an order with no softener such as "please" or "would you" is in most cases considered rude.

For me, I feel it's important to teach my kids to comply with a polite request given in a normal tone. To someone else that may not be as important, or their idea of polite may be different.