[Elora]

Originally Posted by jessisblessed

(i'm having a really bad day so if my posts seem unnecessarily harsh or, even irrational or unreasonable, lets just blame it on that )

fwiw, i think i get what you're saying. here's how my punitive parenting ssis would answer those questions

"What response teaches/enforces healthy boundaries?" i will break the toy in half and throw it in the garbage right in front of their faces to teach them consequences of what will happen if they can't share

"Will this response help keep everyone safe?" yes. no fighting means they're not hurting each other

"What values do I want to teach in this situation?" (respect, patience, kindness, etc...)" i will teach them to share

"Will my response teach them a pattern for how to act in the future?" yes. in the future they will share so that their toys aren't taken

she may not be spanking, but still thnks "you have to make them feel bad to get them to listen"