[tigerlily]

I keep posting thank you's to posts, because I am loving this thread.

I've been reading Families Where Grace Is in Place (I'm not very far) and I think this answers one of the disconnects I was having. The author was talking about how families that are under grace relate to each other -- allowing the individual to be who they are, and how families living under the curse relate -- controlling the other person to behave as I want.

The disconnect was occurring, b/c I'm not seeing where to draw the line with my kids of helping them to be who they are while acting appropriately and when I'm crossing that fine line of controlling. The example of my 4 yo and church comes immediately to mind I want so much for her to sit still, behave, be quiet, act like all the other children her age (and younger!), but it just isn't happening. I need to accept who she is (if her behavior is quiet and not disruptive to let her be, even if it's not what *I* want) and take her out of there when it goes past what she can control.

This is so hard for me -- but I really want to actualize this and live it for my families sake. I'm Realizing that I'm not GBDing b/c of the results it will bring (no one can guarantee that) but rather because I truly believe it is the best way to teach my children (and myself) what they need to know to function at their healthiest in all they do. I can only teach and pray, I can't internalize the lessons for them.

Now I have to work on my constant self talk of how people around me must be judging me to be an ineffective parent (esp. when I'm at Church!).