Earlybird sounds a lot like my oldest. I have to look at the growth we've seen. She no longer hits. She is using words more than growling. Her recovery time from meltdowns is shorter.
Can you see that you are teaching your kids they matter? That you want them to manage their feelings better but that you also are not scared of or offended by them having feelings?
That is HUGE. Perhaps in this season the fruit will be seen more in you than in the kids. In the ways you are growing as a parent.
Do they like crafts? I have found that doing some small craft kits that have clear finishing points is really helpful. Less creative than the way I like to approach art, but really good through repetitive movements and the sense of satisfaction at completion.