i need help from mammas with 2+ kids

[jewel97]

My dd will be 2 in may and I am expecting in October. My patience is non existent... I. Zam sick all the time I can hardly get off the couch. she watches WAY to much Tv... she also has never been a good sleeper. She is finally sleeping longer at night but is having a very hard time falling sleep, most nights it's like 2 hrs of fighting and her going to bed between 11pm and 1 am. This week she has dropped her nap and is falling sleep much easier and between 8-9 pm. The problem with no nap is she is sooooo fussy by like 6. I'm losing my mind!!! Tonight I was so mean to her I feel so terrible! I feel like a terrib mommy. I cant do anything wifh her... but tonight was the worst i think. she was so tired. Tonihht ahe went from playing to screaming her head off in about 30 secs i needed to change her diaper and put jammies on before foing to bed. But she was a monster kicking my belly, screaming, triying to get away.... i lost it. I started screaning at her and and it was really all I could do to keep myself from shaking her... it was very scary for me so I can't imagineed how she felt

What do I do? How do I handle having no patience? Normally I have so much... it has for be the pregnancy. But I can't yell at her like that again... help!!!

[Apple-Saucy]

I would wake her up earlier so she will take an earlier nap and keep the nap short.

My current 2yr old wakes up around 8am lays down for a nap after lunch (about 2 hours) and by nap I mean she's in the bedroom...some days she just plays quietly but most of the time she'll go to sleep fairly quickly. She's typically ready to go to bed for the night around 8:30pm

Other kids when they were 2....#1 about the same as above. #2 I swear he never ever slept. #3 started dropping her nap around 2-2.5 but then would go to bed around 7pm.

[WI Mama05]

If she's dropping her nap, I would try to get her to bed earlier. What time is she waking up?

My oldest was yours age when I was pg with #2.

[Loralee]

It's not easy being pregnant and mothering a two-year-old.

What would happen if you skipped nap and she went to sleep by 6:30. That's about the time ours go to sleep when they drop nap (well, anywhere from 5:45-7, depending on when they got up). Yes, it means we don't do a lot of evening things, but it also keeps me sane.

[klpmommy]

my 2 y.o's have all woken around 5:30-6, not napped & been in bed for the night around 6pm. (for the night might still involve night nursing & always involves snuggles as I cosleep) The amazingly early bedtime is necessary for my sanity.

my worst parenting is always when I;m preg

[lizzyd]

I would try implementing a routine for her. She sounds overtired. I think she is too young to completely drop her nap. Too much TV could also be a culprit. Check out the book "No-Cry Sleep Solution" for some ideas.

[WI Mama05]

Kids vary. One of mine was DONE napping by 2. If what you are doing now is not working, try something else! You have time to get a routine that works for you both down before the new baby comes.

[L-Boogie]

All mamas make mistakes. It's important to forgive yourself.

I would try letting her nap but only for 1/2 hour or so.
I was really nauseous during my 1st trimester with dd2. We read a lot of books so that I wasn't chasing her so much.

[jewel97]

She wakes up around 830-930 but she doest get tired until 5 usher and when she naps that late night time is a disaster

[ValiantJoy07]

pregnancy turns me into an ogre I struggle so muchbwith kindness...ethic just common descencey. I wish I had helpful suggestions... my only advice is that I have found- I rarely parent the way I want to when pregnant, we celebrate the goood days...and watch too much Tv and eat snacks on the couch on the bad. It is a season...lower your expectations, celebrate small successes (I'm talking *small* ) and try to enjoy moments of the ride. Welcoming another person into your life means you will never parent the same...and it changes with each new person that comes. because even when they are smaller than a grain of rice they are changing the dynamic...stretching more than your skin in preperation for their place in your pves..mit is ok to struggle, to grieve the changes...you guys will get to the new place and you'll wonder how you ever were with out the newest memmlber. :hear

Sorry if that is a bit preachy ..nak and hurrying

[Loralee]

I thought it woul make them wake up earlier too, but that hasn't been true for us. If they've not had enough sleep, and I put them to bed earlier, they sleep later. My 3.5 had a messed-up week last week and was up late. This week, she's been going to bed between 7-8 and sleeping until 8-9 a.m. Yep. 13 hours sttn. It's glorious.

Well, it'd be more glorious if her younger sister did the same thing.

[Tandem mama]

You've gotten good advice about the nap dropping transition. That's a hard transition! Do you think that's the main issue? Pregnancy can bring out our worst parenting sometimes. There may be more that can help you to find balance.

What are areas you're willing to let go? For instance, would it be helpful if you didn't have to struggle to get pj's on and just let her sleep in a diaper with extra blankets or the thermostat turned up or maybe just letting her sleep in her clothes?

Does her watching tv bother you because you have strong beliefs on this subject or are you concerned that it isn't what good parents do? Do you think extra tv is affecting her sleep? If you're only bothered because of what others might think, try to let that go. If it is something more, reflect on that and decide whether it's a big enough deal for you to try and cut back or if you are actually okay with it for this season in your lives.


Is it feasible to get a slide or something in your house for her to practice some gross motor skills while you rest nearby? A slide in the living room can get toddler energy out while mommy is able to stay nearby, on the couch, and rest.

What can your DH do to help you? Can he take over bedtime? Is there any area that he can take over for this season?

it'll get better. Nap dropping plus pregnancy is really hard!

[MomtoJGJ]

Also, a little bit of letting you know you are not alone... When I was pregnant with DD2 I was very very angry all the time... rage-y really. I could not stand being touched one more time... ever. She was still waking up 2398529845 times at night... it ended immediately with birth. I was fine.

When I was about 5 months along I got to where I could bite my tongue and walk away and cry and hit something instead of wanting to take it out on dd1. I remember that feeling of wanting to just shake her.... I remember it vividly one time that I actually grabbed her and picked her up in front of me before my senses kicked in and I just hugged her instead of shaking her.

But it did end... and I've never had that with another pregnancy.

[jewel97]

Thanks guys I'm just glad I'm not the only one... and I do need to lower my standards for myself. I am to hard on myself. I hate that she watches to much TV. But only cause it makes me feel like a bad mom. I honestly don't care to watch cartoons all day I just wish I wasn't so grumpy. I totally get the not wanting to even be touched. I really really wanted to let her wean herself but it's so painful and I can't stand for her to touch me when she nurses. So we are down to just bed time. But she broke my heart the other day. I was laying on the couch and she climbed up on me and laid her head on my chest and I asked her what she was doing and she said I miss your wawa's mommy. Wawa's is what she calls them. Oh my gosh I just sat there and cried... I feel like I'm failing her I knew once the baby came things would be different but I didn't think being pregnant would be so hard

---------- Post added at 02:20 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:15 PM ----------

Oh and i wish dh could do bed time but she is so much of a moms girl daddy cant get near her unless its on her terms... im planning to make him do more with the new baby. He worked 3rd shift when dd was little and all she had was me and. Now that he is home she wont let him help.

[Apple-Saucy]

IME 2yr old's (except my #2 ) average 11-13/14 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period. Yeah I've added it up