House cleanliness standard for hospitality

[Virginia]

Originally Posted by BriansLovie

This made me laugh!!! Now I guess I better clean like a mad woman before you come visit some day!

I struggle with this. I'm not a great housekeeper and it bothers me a lot. I always freak out about cleaning when someone comes over. I worry about what they think of me. But I think I need to just relax because I am a mother who can't do it all and I have three boys and a husband who pee on the floor sometimes. .

Nooooo, please don't feel like you have to! I'm just saying that I notice things, not that I judge Also, I don't have kids like a lot of the people in this thread, so I'd NEVER expect their house to be clean or clutter-free

Since I only have a cat and a husband, I have no excuse for having a messy house

[MrsHutch]

I have kind of a backwards problem. DH is like you about wanting the entire place to be spotless, whereas I have the, "they are coming to see us, not our house" attitude. I want the place to be reasonably picked up, but I'm not going for magazine-ready in the way DH is. It makes having company over ABSOLUTELY MISERABLE for both of us, and it means we rarely invite people over.

[SamRose]

Originally Posted by Virginia

Nooooo, please don't feel like you have to! I'm just saying that I notice things, not that I judge Also, I don't have kids like a lot of the people in this thread, so I'd NEVER expect their house to be clean or clutter-free

Since I only have a cat and a husband, I have no excuse for having a messy house

Oh, I see/notice it, but it doesnt usually register in any way other than being present. (except when it registers as 'wow, she's more comfy w/ me than I thought to let me see this. ')

[lucie]

I notice mess, too, but it doesn't bother me--if anything, it's a relief because then I know the expectations are not going to be high when they come over to our place.
We don't have many visitors; actually, we haven't had anyone over in the last two years . Except out of town family who stayed several days, or in the case of my mom, several weeks . For long term guests like that, I like to have things wiped down and neat upon their arrival, and then I just let it slip into the usual comfortable state.
If someone's coming over just for a play date or chat, I like to have furniture dusted, bathrooms clean, and surfaces reasonably empty or at least organized. But that's something I've been working on for myself, because I feel a lot more relaxed when the apartment is clean and uncluttered.


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[Michele123]

I used to keep a very clean and neat house. Then I had a high needs baby and my standard slipped a little. Then she became mobile and my standard slipped a bit more. Then I got pregnant, DD turned 2, I started teaching and our vacuum cleaner broke. Again. Yeah, my house is AWEFUL right now.


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[believer]

Ok, other people's houses do sometimes gross me out and the things that bother me are the ones I try to focus on in my own home. First - bathrooms - should be decent, have soap and a clean towel to dry hands, toilet paper, and a trash can available in case it is that time of month.
The rest of the house should be clean - a little clutter is ok, but dead bugs or old food is just gross.
I once knew someone who often had food on her kitchen table from whatever the last meal was - she wanted the kids to go back and eat it later or would let them do that or something. I love her to death, but that was rather icky to me.
Also, dd used to go to one friend's house and go barefoot there and come home with filthy feet - from inside the house - not outside. That is just disgusting. There were other problems with that family and after a while I tried not to let her go there, but have her friend over to our house instead.
So, gross dirt is nasty.
A bit of clutter is fine.

When it is my house, I sometimes get a bit obsessive and want things perfect, but I also like to use having company as an excuse to get the place really clean. I get a bit anxious about it sometimes though, which I know is not good.
If it is people I know well, I am ok with things not being perfect, but may be a bit embarrassed at times.

[sweetpeas]

Originally Posted by believer

Also, dd used to go to one friend's house and go barefoot there and come home with filthy feet - from inside the house - not outside. That is just disgusting. There were other problems with that family and after a while I tried not to let her go there, but have her friend over to our house instead.
So, gross dirt is nasty.
A bit of clutter is fine.
.

We live in the country, the kids are in and out of the house a thousand times a day, which is what I want . . . that's why we live in the country. And we have wood floors (also my preference, I'd rather have the floors look/feel dirty, and leave my feet dirty, than have all that dirt trapped in carpet where I can't get to it!). So yeah, especially during rainy or snowy weather and such, short of scrubbing the entire main floor daily, or more often, our feet get dirty walking on our floors. But it's DIRT, just good clean, outside dirt, AND I can clean it well, when I clean it, I had carpet in our last 2 houses and I hated that all that dirt was there, just not where we could see it OR get to it (short of steam cleaning the carpet which is a rather major operation).

[lucie]

Dead bugs??? Yeah that would bother me too.



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[peekaboomama]

Originally Posted by lucie

Dead bugs??? Yeah that would bother me too.



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Yeah... one dead bug I'd give them the benefit of the doubt that it was a recent fatality (like in the past day, hadn't seen it yet) but multiple dead bugs would ick me out.

[zak]

I've decided my love for people outweighs my need for every Lego and spec of dust to be off the floor.

I make it company ready as best I can in 20 minutes. Then I chill.

[believer]

Originally Posted by sweetpeas

We live in the country, the kids are in and out of the house a thousand times a day, which is what I want . . . that's why we live in the country. And we have wood floors (also my preference, I'd rather have the floors look/feel dirty, and leave my feet dirty, than have all that dirt trapped in carpet where I can't get to it!). So yeah, especially during rainy or snowy weather and such, short of scrubbing the entire main floor daily, or more often, our feet get dirty walking on our floors. But it's DIRT, just good clean, outside dirt, AND I can clean it well, when I clean it, I had carpet in our last 2 houses and I hated that all that dirt was there, just not where we could see it OR get to it (short of steam cleaning the carpet which is a rather major operation).

I can understand that out in the country - but these people were not.
And I agree that carpets hold lots of dirt.

[Virginia]

Side note: I cannot wait to move out of our carpet-filled apartment. It holds so much dust, dirt, and dander in it.

[RealLifeMama]

Originally Posted by Virginia

We live out of the way, so we don't get many visitors When someone is coming to visit, even family, I want the house spotless

But...I think I'm a little different than you guys If I go over to someone's house, I totally notice if it's dirty. I don't necessarily judge them or anything, but I definitely see the cobwebs in the corner, the dust on top of the ceiling fan blades, etc. I don't mean to It just happens

This made me laugh and think of a story. I have told this story here before, but a lot of you are new, so I will retell. First, I struggled so much to keep things clean when my oldest three were 5, 3, and a baby. DH is part of a fellowship that used to have a Christmas party yearly. No one wanted to the party host one year (the year my children were 5, 3, and a baby), so we volunteered. We were up until the wee hours of the night cleaning and decorating our home for Christmas to make it festive, and I was baking. My standard for hospitality was decluttered, and cleaning things that affected people. Like, basic kitchen cleaning (counters, floors, sink, etc.) Bathrooms, lightswitches, doorknobs, stairrails, vacuuminging, etc.) I thought it was all good and very comfortable and festive. I did not detail my house for appearances. I did wipe the range and oven door, but I did not clean the drip pans. One of the women went into the kitchen and saw my stove. She said to me "You must cook a lot! Your stove pans are so dirty!"

Sometime very soon after, a neighbor dropped by unannounced, happened to see all the cobwebs on our needs-a-extension-ladder-to-clean-it-two-story-foyer-window and said "Wow, you have a lot of cobwebs!"

So, I know people notice, I just would not think they'd say anything!!!

[charla]

I wouldn't think they'd say anything either.

[Virginia]

Wow, I'm kind of shocked that people said anything!