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Old 11-22-2014, 12:49 PM   #1
LovingMummy
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Default Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

I don't know why people say that the two's are 'terrible'. I'm finding three to be soooo much harder. DD was 3 in September and she is into EVERYTHING! Except now she is bigger and stronger and smarter. She runs into our room and wakes the baby (on purpose, then she comes and tells me he's awake ) goes in the bathroom and puts on my make up ('I have pink lips Mama!') stuffs the drain with toilet paper, teases and hurts her brothers... I could go on... and DS1 of course joins in, although on his own he plays very well and has an amazing attention span.

And the tantrums and fits... I haven't seen anything like this since she was 18 months old (which has been the hardest time with my two so far) To top it off she's stopped napping so now spends two hours coming out of her room for kisses, to say hi, to ask for snacks and ice cream... sigh... and I'm very introverted and need that time to recover and prepare for the next 3 hours of insanity.

I don't mean to sound all negative- just ranting- but does anyone have tips of how to keep her out of trouble? Busy?? she has lots of toys but rarely plays with them. DH says to put her in a playpen but that seems a bit extreme. But some days I'm at my wits end and trying really hard not to totally lose it.
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Old 11-22-2014, 02:48 PM   #2
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

it is very common behavior for 3 yr olds esp those who have a new baby.When my gdd was 3 my dd (her mama) said she had to get out the baby gates and gate off kitchen and keep her out of bathrooms etc.If you are nursing is important of course to let hr have other arm and have those "when you were a baby" times.
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Old 11-22-2014, 04:28 PM   #3
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

Three was more difficult here too. My second DD turned three shortly after my third was born. We had to be proactive with keeping things that she could get into out of her reach like the toilet paper and makeup in your case. You may also be able to get her to play something on her own if you sit with her for ten or fifteen minutes at the start of the activity. Once she's into it, you may be able to steal away. I don't know how old your baby is, but your three year old still needs connection with you. It's so hard to do for me as an introvert.

For help managing tantrums, I've had to make sure my three year olds eat often to avoid blood sugar crashes. They don't eat much, but it needs to be at regular intervals in our case.
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Old 11-22-2014, 04:45 PM   #4
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

Things that helped last year:
Fresh air for both of us
More food for her
tv
skyping with her grandparents who appreciated her being a nutball
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Old 11-22-2014, 04:53 PM   #5
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

I was thinking baby gates too....that would help her and you too! when middle son was 3 yo he was constantly in the BR experimenting with anything available.....the tub was a dangerous place to step into as he used it to mix soaps, shampoos and such. All of it got put under the sink and the doors of the cabinet locked. Maybe securing stuff and locking it up will help??
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Old 11-22-2014, 05:16 PM   #6
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

I thought three was going to send me to an early grave. Baby gates were certainly helpful, and I quickly learned to put my makeup up high where little hands couldn't get to it. Getting outside in the fresh air whenever possible was an absolute life saver (and sanity saver!).
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Old 11-22-2014, 06:20 PM   #7
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

Preschool?? Creche?? IOW putting her into a good environment for her age to explore with a good routine and crowd control. Not that I could have brought myself to do that with my first, but I have learnt after having so many!
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Old 11-22-2014, 11:04 PM   #8
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

Not that I want to promote screen time, but for me, sometimes it is a sanity saver for me. Especially when I'm trying to homeschool my older two. I will give my 3yo the tablet, and let him play educational games like starfall, or watch pbskids shows, or I will put Cosmic Kids yoga (on YouTube) for him, and he will do yoga independently for quite awhile. It's not ideal, giving screen time, but sometimes it's the only way Mama can function, and still be a kind mama. And to me, the benefits outweigh the cost.

I agree with others that some things you'll just need to be proactive about. Like makeup and toilet paper. She just doesn't have the impulse control yet. Same with waking up little brother. My guess is she is doing it more out of curiosity if your response will be the same ("no") as before. It's more like testing the laws of nature than deliberately doing it to irritate you.
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Old 11-23-2014, 06:26 AM   #9
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

Yes sometimes at 3 they figure out they can do all these things - they arent being "naughty". Like the time my gdd got up on the kitchen counter nd unpeeled and took bites out of a lot of bananas
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Old 11-23-2014, 12:29 PM   #10
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

These replies have been so helpful! So nice to know I'm not alone. I just wish someone would have prepared me- they say the two's are hard so I expected things to be so much easier at 3! When they weren't I thought maybe something was wrong.

We did have gates but we moved and haven't got all that set up yet. And locks on the doors! I think part of it is that we spent ALL of summer outdoors, aside from eating (even then we had picnics) and sleeping. Now it is cold and snowy so we are mostly indoors and there isn't nearly as much to safely explore. DH is going child proof a room in the basement asap (he is working 14 days 12 hours shifts) so they can go down there and run and play.

I always forget about snacks too

---------- Post added at 01:29 PM ---------- Previous post was at 01:27 PM ----------

Oh and we don't do any screen time but sometimes I am sooooo tempted...
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Old 11-23-2014, 01:15 PM   #11
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

My dd said the same thing when her dd turned 3.She said she never had to use the gates and safety latches up until that point!
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Old 11-23-2014, 02:36 PM   #12
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

My toddlers liked to listen to music, audio plays and books on CD. That was before the tablets and computers. I also enjoyed those songs and stories while doing chores and nursing tha baby.
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Old 11-24-2014, 07:22 AM   #13
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

My daughter needed to be outside and to leave the house at three. This was not a want, it was a need. If those things did not happen, she lost whatever sense she ever had and went crazy.
Preschool fit the bill for us because she left the house and played outside with other kids. It was only a half day and that was enough. I don't think she could have done a full day even though it was play based because it was a lot for her.
On the weekends we planned to take her to the park or some other activity that was outdoors and that really helped her. If she could not go outside because of the weather, she got baths, finger paints, oobleck and other sensory activities. While those helped, the outdoor play was the best thing for her.
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Old 11-24-2014, 01:45 PM   #14
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

Yes, outdoor play is the best, weather permitting! We don't go out most mornings because it's a lot for me to take all three little ones out, and if the baby doesn't have a good morning nap he gets very cranky. We do do a library time but on some days she is extremely sensitive and clings to me crying the whole time, which makes it even harder!

I read the thread on sensory play and it was very helpful. I think she needs a lot of that (not sure if she has a disorder, she has a speech and large motor delay and is still having evaluations.) Right now she is sitting behind me happily pouring water over a baking pan!
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Old 11-24-2014, 01:55 PM   #15
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Default Re: Keeping 3 year old occupied? (and preserving my sanity!)

3 was the age where i would let them take long baths. door open not much water, and lots of towels on the floor. sometimes i would just sit outside the door and read, or clean the bathroom, but just having the "3" contained for a bit was super helpful.
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