Gentle Christian Mothers Community
 
Random Quotes from Wise Mamas

~* Please help keep GCM free by using our
Amazon.com affiliate link. Thank you! *~


Go Back   Gentle Christian Mothers Community > Specific Issues > Gentle Discipline *Public* > GD Info and FAQs *Public*
Forgot Password? Join Us!

GD Info and FAQs *Public* The new home for most of the GD stickies. :)

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 10-10-2008, 08:11 PM   #1
illinoismommy
Rose Garden
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 25,670
illinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond repute
Default spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

help!
__________________

Mommy to: Ds (9.5), Dd (7), Ds2 (6), and Ds3 (4.5).

illinoismommy is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to illinoismommy For This Useful Post:
Annalou (01-20-2013)
Old 10-12-2008, 07:22 PM   #2
Soliloquy
Administrator
 
I am a silkie hen.
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: In the coop.
Posts: 44,334
Soliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

I tell Gracie flat-out, "When you talk like this [demonstrate whiney voice] it's called whining. It really, really annoys me. Please ask me like this [demonstrate non-whiny voice]"

So far it's working. She's 4.5.
__________________
Lisa, 45. Married to My Hero for 21 years! Survivor of very severe aplastic anemia. Living with PNH

Firmly Planted.
"So live in Christ Jesus the Lord in the same way as you received him. Be rooted and built up in him, be established in faith, and overflow with thanksgiving just as you were taught." Col 2:6-7

Moderator in Theological & Doctrinal Issues, Drawing Closer, Bible Study, & Educating Our Children

Mom to 5 wonderful kids!
G - 14, S - 12,
F - 10, J - 8, Baby L - 2 . 2 dogs, 4 cats, and some chickens.
My Instagram
Soliloquy is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Soliloquy For This Useful Post:
Annalou (01-20-2013)
Old 10-12-2008, 08:37 PM   #3
Joanne
Deactivated
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 8,071
Joanne has a reputation beyond reputeJoanne has a reputation beyond reputeJoanne has a reputation beyond reputeJoanne has a reputation beyond reputeJoanne has a reputation beyond reputeJoanne has a reputation beyond reputeJoanne has a reputation beyond reputeJoanne has a reputation beyond reputeJoanne has a reputation beyond reputeJoanne has a reputation beyond reputeJoanne has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

The best way here is:

limit TV
limit computer time
limit junk food

"Asked and answered"

"Conversation over"

"You're whining. Try again."
Joanne is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Joanne For This Useful Post:
hellomama (08-06-2013), SuperDudesMama (01-08-2010)
Old 10-13-2008, 12:12 AM   #4
Can Dance
Rose Garden
 
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 7,402
Can Dance has a reputation beyond reputeCan Dance has a reputation beyond reputeCan Dance has a reputation beyond reputeCan Dance has a reputation beyond reputeCan Dance has a reputation beyond reputeCan Dance has a reputation beyond reputeCan Dance has a reputation beyond reputeCan Dance has a reputation beyond reputeCan Dance has a reputation beyond reputeCan Dance has a reputation beyond reputeCan Dance has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

youre whining. I dont want to hear it. try again. I cant understand your words when you whine. stop whining. tell me in real words what you want.

it works most of the time.
__________________
Mum to MayFlowers:
DD1 4/2004
DD2 13/2006
DS 24/2009
and my Hawaiian Surprise
DS 9/1/11
Can Dance is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Can Dance For This Useful Post:
Annalou (01-20-2013), SewingGreenMama (08-04-2012)
Old 10-13-2008, 04:18 AM   #5
Close2MyHeart
Deactivated
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 20,708
Close2MyHeart has a reputation beyond reputeClose2MyHeart has a reputation beyond reputeClose2MyHeart has a reputation beyond reputeClose2MyHeart has a reputation beyond reputeClose2MyHeart has a reputation beyond reputeClose2MyHeart has a reputation beyond reputeClose2MyHeart has a reputation beyond reputeClose2MyHeart has a reputation beyond reputeClose2MyHeart has a reputation beyond reputeClose2MyHeart has a reputation beyond reputeClose2MyHeart has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

"I dont' like to listen to you when you whine. Start over in a non-whiny voice"

That gets used a lot around here. DD just turned 5 and is a champion whiner.
Close2MyHeart is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Close2MyHeart For This Useful Post:
Annalou (01-20-2013)
Old 10-15-2008, 01:18 PM   #6
canadiyank
Deactivated
I support GCM!
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Central WA
Posts: 17,211
canadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

I've taught the difference between a "high" or "whining" voice and a "low" or "pleasant" tone of voice. I tell them to try again in a pleasant tone of voice. We've practiced them at neutral times (they think the "high/whining" voice is hilarious when we practice ) so I can pull in that skill during a situation.

I also do "asked and answered" and, if really frustrated, I walk away. Mostly scripting them to try again in a low tone of voice works. At first I had to say exactly what I wanted to hear, then just "try again with a low tone of voice," now I just say, "Try again."

canadiyank is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to canadiyank For This Useful Post:
Hopetobe (08-16-2013)
Old 10-15-2008, 05:25 PM   #7
illinoismommy
Rose Garden
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 25,670
illinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond reputeillinoismommy has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

Hey, these are all really great, though I can see we're doing things fine because we do these things so apparently its just perseverence

Maybe we should sticky this topic, its pretty common!
__________________

Mommy to: Ds (9.5), Dd (7), Ds2 (6), and Ds3 (4.5).

illinoismommy is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to illinoismommy For This Useful Post:
Annalou (01-20-2013)
Old 10-16-2008, 12:26 PM   #8
canadiyank
Deactivated
I support GCM!
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Central WA
Posts: 17,211
canadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

Good idea!
canadiyank is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-16-2008, 05:32 PM   #9
Soliloquy
Administrator
 
I am a silkie hen.
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: In the coop.
Posts: 44,334
Soliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

Oh yeah, it definitely takes perseverance. When people are really tired, hungry, etc. (young or old) whining kind of comes naturally but it can be trained out.
__________________
Lisa, 45. Married to My Hero for 21 years! Survivor of very severe aplastic anemia. Living with PNH

Firmly Planted.
"So live in Christ Jesus the Lord in the same way as you received him. Be rooted and built up in him, be established in faith, and overflow with thanksgiving just as you were taught." Col 2:6-7

Moderator in Theological & Doctrinal Issues, Drawing Closer, Bible Study, & Educating Our Children

Mom to 5 wonderful kids!
G - 14, S - 12,
F - 10, J - 8, Baby L - 2 . 2 dogs, 4 cats, and some chickens.
My Instagram
Soliloquy is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Soliloquy For This Useful Post:
mokamoto (09-16-2009)
Old 10-16-2008, 09:04 PM   #10
Blueberrybabies
Climbing Rose
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 1,348
Blueberrybabies has a spectacular aura aboutBlueberrybabies has a spectacular aura aboutBlueberrybabies has a spectacular aura about
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

Sometimes it works here to do some sort of playful parenting. "Oh, no, there's something wrong with my ears! Are you saying something?"
__________________
Carly Wife to my first love since 12/2002 Mama of A (dd 7) G (ds 5.5) E (dd 4)
Blueberrybabies is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Blueberrybabies For This Useful Post:
mokamoto (09-16-2009)
Old 10-16-2008, 09:07 PM   #11
HummusDip
Guest
 
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

It's not ok to whine.

That's what I usually say and I ask her to tell me in a normal voice. But I like the idea of practicing in neutral times and calling it a pleasant voice.

What's ask and answer?
  Reply With Quote
Old 10-17-2008, 05:56 AM   #12
SonshineMama
Rose Garden
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Resting in Jesus Arms!
Posts: 23,489
SonshineMama has a reputation beyond reputeSonshineMama has a reputation beyond reputeSonshineMama has a reputation beyond reputeSonshineMama has a reputation beyond reputeSonshineMama has a reputation beyond reputeSonshineMama has a reputation beyond reputeSonshineMama has a reputation beyond reputeSonshineMama has a reputation beyond reputeSonshineMama has a reputation beyond reputeSonshineMama has a reputation beyond reputeSonshineMama has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

Usually I just say "Mama doesn't respond to whining, try again" but sometimes I say "Mama doesn't speak whinese, try again in a calm voice" if I can tell they need a playful parent to turn the situation around.

__________________
Jodi

Please excuse typos. .


Lovin' and servin' Jesus, Married to my Soulmate
Gentle Naturally-Oriented Mama to 3 amazing young people.
Homeschooling while working full time
SonshineMama is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to SonshineMama For This Useful Post:
Annalou (01-20-2013)
Old 10-20-2008, 10:34 AM   #13
Soliloquy
Administrator
 
I am a silkie hen.
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: In the coop.
Posts: 44,334
Soliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond reputeSoliloquy has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

Quote:
Originally Posted by HummusDip

What's ask and answer?
"Asked and answered" if for when you've already given an answer but they keep asking in a whiny voice. If you'd said "No" to TV but they keep saying, "But Mom, pleeeeaase can I watch TV?" You say, "That question has already been asked and it's already been answered."
__________________
Lisa, 45. Married to My Hero for 21 years! Survivor of very severe aplastic anemia. Living with PNH

Firmly Planted.
"So live in Christ Jesus the Lord in the same way as you received him. Be rooted and built up in him, be established in faith, and overflow with thanksgiving just as you were taught." Col 2:6-7

Moderator in Theological & Doctrinal Issues, Drawing Closer, Bible Study, & Educating Our Children

Mom to 5 wonderful kids!
G - 14, S - 12,
F - 10, J - 8, Baby L - 2 . 2 dogs, 4 cats, and some chickens.
My Instagram
Soliloquy is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Soliloquy For This Useful Post:
Annalou (01-20-2013)
Old 10-20-2008, 10:44 AM   #14
canadiyank
Deactivated
I support GCM!
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Central WA
Posts: 17,211
canadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond reputecanadiyank has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

I also use, "What do you think?" when they get in that cycle, and a lot of times it interrupts that cycle for my dd while she thinks of her answer. Very helpful!
canadiyank is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2008, 07:30 PM   #15
nurturinglovely
Guest
 
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: spin off-- how DO you discourage whining?

Quote:
Originally Posted by canadiyank
I also use, "What do you think?" when they get in that cycle, and a lot of times it interrupts that cycle for my dd while she thinks of her answer. Very helpful!
yeah.... that's kind of funny....

i do that too - but 5yo tells me i said no, and then proceeds to throw himself of the floor, flop around and say, BUT WHYYYYYYYY??????????? (waaaaaa...)
  Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:57 PM.


A variety of opinions and ideas are shared on GCM. Personal experiences, suggestions, and tips found here are in no way intended to substitute for medical counsel from a healthcare professional. Always use your own good judgement and seek professional advice when in doubt about a health concern.

Amazon.com affiliate link

Copyright 1997-2017 by Gentle Christian Mothers™
An alternative-minded, evangelical Christian community supporting attachment parenting and natural living.

Do not post content elsewhere.
http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/community/

Some smilies created and copyrighted by Mazeguy.
Some smilies and avatars created and copyrighted by flowermama and children -- do not use elsewhere.

Soli Deo Gloria
To God only wise, be glory through Jesus Christ for ever. Amen. ~ Romans 16:27 (KJV)

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.3
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.