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05-31-2013, 03:30 PM | #31 |
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Re: When kids are VERY messy. . . constant reminders abt pick up??
I am related to people ("the cousins") who are doing hard labor-y chores from like age 4. I am hyper sensitive and worried I am messing my kids up because they are pigs. Like seriously, their 4-5 year olds could clean a bathroom (CLEAN it), load/empty the dish washer, put their laundry away, vacuum/mop. And a ton of other things too. I feel like I am doing something wrong and/or raising lazy boys. (Yes, my oldest is 8).
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05-31-2013, 03:48 PM | #32 |
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Re: When kids are VERY messy. . . constant reminders abt pick up??
just seeing this post, but this has been me lately
My kids are 14 and 12. I feeeeeeeel like I am going insane beating my head against a brick wall!!!!!!! I repeat myself CONSTANTLY!!!! and my son is entering puberty....oh Lord have mercy......he's smart mouthed, forgetful, funny, and angry all rolled in one. I keep trying (repeat trying) to remind myself that this too shall pass and they will be gone before I blink.
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05-31-2013, 04:23 PM | #33 | ||
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Re: When kids are VERY messy. . . constant reminders abt pick up??
Quote:
I personally feel I start my kids young but here is a little perspective on what is meant by that. My 7 year old has just learned to load the dishwasher - she's been emptying with my help since 18 months (she likes the silverware but doesn't ever empty dishes cuz they get broken - we use almost no plastic). Putting away laundry w/help starts at 5 (7 year old is doing without help now but only since she turned 7). Mop/vacuum is for fun only until about 11 and even then I chip in. Bathroom cleaning. Okay, my son has been CLEAN CLEANING the bathroom since age 3 but that was montessori based therapy due to steroid rage and not something I did with any other kids. My oldest (just turned 13) just learned to clean the bathroom - ds likes to do it so much that even I rarely clean the bathroom My goal is by 14 that they can clean the whole house although my son is already capable of cleaning the whole house but he's not only tidy but likes cleaning. The girls? Not so much - not their bent and I require it of them for life skills. I really like Jane Nelson's chore guide in Positive Discipline A-Z. She lists chores that are developmentally appropriate ---------- Post added at 06:23 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:20 PM ---------- Quote:
My son has been entering puberty for a while now UGH. . . the hormones are horrid. He finds cleaning to be therapeutic but as I said above, he LIKES it
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06-01-2013, 03:08 PM | #34 |
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Re: When kids are VERY messy. . . constant reminders abt pick up??
We just did a whole family, whole house clean-up because our landlord was coming over. The house wasn't trashed but every room had some "stuff" lying around that I wanted put away and I wanted to sweep or run the vacuum in every room. It went SO QUICKLY because I had dh helping me. He kept the kids on task while I followed with the broom and vacuum. Normally, my 3 and 4 year-olds get side-tracked and start playing, getting as many things out as they put away. My older two just move really s l o w l y at picking up because they don't like it and frankly don't care if their stuff is everywhere.
I was naturally tidy as a child. None of my kids seem to have the tidy gene. They do like scrubbing and dusting in short bursts. It is very helpful to know that, as they get older, they will be able to see the big picture and understand that if we ALL work together we can be done in no time. |
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06-01-2013, 05:53 PM | #35 |
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Re: When kids are VERY messy. . . constant reminders abt pick up??
even your t4 Grace doesn't have the tidy gene???? when I was in school, I couldn't study if my room was a mess. I need things to be put away!!!!
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06-01-2013, 06:52 PM | #36 | |
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Quote:
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06-02-2013, 06:17 AM | #37 | |
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I am the mountain. I am not the storm and the storm is not me. -Ian Cron
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Re: When kids are VERY messy. . . constant reminders abt pick up??
Quote:
How I motivate them is that I don't allow any "fun" until the work is done (no screens, no outside time, no board games, etc). It's been that way for several years so I don't think they even considered arguing
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~Spring always comes after winter~ 2 Corinthians 4:16 “ Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. ” |
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The Following User Says Thank You to tempus vernum For This Useful Post: | Soliloquy (06-02-2013) |
06-02-2013, 06:18 AM | #38 |
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Re: When kids are VERY messy. . . constant reminders abt pick up??
We did a whole family clean up yesterday (DH even did the dishes.... by hand! ). It was great.
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06-09-2013, 06:33 PM | #39 |
Rose Garden
I am the mountain. I am not the storm and the storm is not me. -Ian Cron
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Re: When kids are VERY messy. . . constant reminders abt pick up??
Yesterday my mom came over to drop dd1 off and she asked "Is your house really clean?" and I said "hmm. . . I don't think so" and then I realized IT IS! It's SO tidy since we started this and I'm already used to it
plus, with not having to pick up after my kids, I am finding the energy to CLEAN CLEAN again We did a fast house blessing today and dh and I had the whole house dusted, vacuumed, swept, and bathrooms done in 15 minutes We also got a new bedroom set and our office got rearranged so we have a more "compartmentalized house" (i.e. no desk in living room or bedroom) Now, if I can get rid of the rest of my clutter, I'd be REALLY happy BUT I'm slowly having the energy to declutter and clean again so I have hope that will happen soon. I'm almost giddy with joy that we've made it this far
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~Spring always comes after winter~ 2 Corinthians 4:16 “ Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. ” |
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06-12-2013, 02:28 PM | #40 |
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Why climb a mountain? Because it's there!
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That's really exciting!! Now I just need to hang in there until mine are older. The older two need, me to stay on top of them, still. The younger two help willingly.
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The Following User Says Thank You to Soliloquy For This Useful Post: | tempus vernum (06-13-2013) |
07-13-2015, 08:51 PM | #41 |
Rose Garden
I am the mountain. I am not the storm and the storm is not me. -Ian Cron
Join Date: Mar 2005
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Re: When kids are VERY messy. . . constant reminders abt pick up??
I found this thread because I was trying to get motivation to keep decluttering and searching for what worked for me in the past. With my oldest two gone and my youngest in camp, I had big plans for the week.
What is amazing? We still use this system successfully We've added things (lawn care, gardening, plant work, laundry help, and helping with the "cleaning" part). BUT with the exception of piles of clutter, our house ends up tidy once or twice a day It's now fairly common for all of my dc to participate in "cleaning" not just tidying. In a pinch, it's still my ds who steps up and cleans the bathrooms
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~Spring always comes after winter~ 2 Corinthians 4:16 “ Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. ” |
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to tempus vernum For This Useful Post: | Blue-EyedLady (07-18-2015), Soliloquy (07-14-2015) |
07-14-2015, 12:20 PM | #42 |
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Re: When kids are VERY messy. . . constant reminders abt pick up??
to read
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07-14-2015, 01:19 PM | #43 |
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Re: When kids are VERY messy. . . constant reminders abt pick up??
This was a good read,I neeed new ideas. My system is pretty straight forward. Sometime in the late afternoon,I turn off the tv,turn on music and instruct my kids to clean up the living room and dining room. If they trashed their bedrooms that day,those get done too. It's EXHAUSTING. I stand over my four year old half the time because he gets distracted in no time. My eight year old picks up a corner and then stands around hoping she's done until I give her another corner or category. Twenty minutes later,everything is fairly neat. Ugh. My two year old happily helps for a little while which is fine.
My mantra is "If it doesn't fit in the vacuum,pick it up." And also, "Finish the task." When we're all done,I give specific praise and do my best to say yes to whatever they want to do next. And I comment "Now,we have a nice clean floor to enjoy as a family." Sometimes we play charades. But the actual making them clean up is awful and tiring I don't feel gentle and kind,I feel unyielding and tougher than I want to be. But I refuse to let them grow up the way I did. Mom did EVERYTHING and it was terrible for us. I don't know how to have a less stressful clean up time. I can try the chip system. |
07-19-2015, 01:09 PM | #44 |
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I Am A BananaCake
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Re: When kids are VERY messy. . . constant reminders abt pick up??
We've been using the "Flip a Coin" app that Crystal suggested and having the kids each do a room rather than work on it together. Oh my goodness! So much better!
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The Following User Says Thank You to bananacake For This Useful Post: | Soliloquy (07-19-2015) |
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