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08-17-2017, 08:46 PM | #1 |
Rose Bouquet
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 880
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Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
We just recently moved from a condo to a house, which has a (small) fenced in back yard and a lot more space than our condo.
DH and I are thinking we'd like to get a dog. (I had a dog before l married DH, a border collie/lab mix I adopted when he was a year old-- he was a great dog but was several years old by the time we had DS, and he was not adjusting well to having a baby in his space so we re-homed him to dear friends where he had an awesome life. We also always had a family dog growing up.) Anyways, we want to get a dog for a few reasons: 1) DH wants a dog who will bark/alert us if people are at the door or outside house. I would also feel better having a dog here as well when I am home on my own with kids. I don't mean like a vicious watch dog- I just mean a dog that will bark and alert me if someone was ever coming into home or was at front door. 2) I think DS is ready for some more responsibility and would really enjoy having a dog to play with. I know we (DH and I) will be doing the vast majority of the work with the dog, but I think DS could handle feeding/providing water and he loves to go on walks with my dad's golden retriever so I think the walks would be a nice family thing to do together (plus I have fenced in backyard so we can easily let dog out between walks). So the most important qualities for us in a dog are: 1) good with kids 2) large enough so that the bark would deter unwanted guests/act as protection Ok. So here's my question. Given the above, and the fact that we want to adopt a puppy (I really want a puppy no matter what the breed, so that it is used to DD especially and we can train it to be tolerant of kids from the beginning), what breed would you get? I am seeing lots of Labrador Retrievers and Boxer puppies in my area on PetFinder, and actually some Lab/boxer mixes, and those breeds are appealing to me. Any others I should consider?
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Kate
Married to the Haitian Sensation since 2007 Mom to S, DS since October 2009 and E, DD born February 22nd, 2016 |
08-18-2017, 06:01 AM | #2 |
Rose Garden
An Enneagram 7 type 1/2 ENTP
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Malawi!
Posts: 6,295
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
My first response would be NOOOOOO. If you must get a dog, get an adult dog. A puppy is like having another toddler except one that doesn't wear diapers. But if you MUST get a puppy...
I'd do some research on different breed temperaments and figure out what you want from there. I'm no expert, but I know labs and boxers are great dogs but SUPER high energy. We have a 4 month old standard poodle and we are crazy about her. She's an annoying puppy, but super smart and not as high energy as some breeds.
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Stacy here!
Enjoying my Complementarian marriage to Mr. Hutch since May 20, 2006 Blessed Mama of Miss H (16), Mr Big J (15), Miss T (14), Mr Little J (11), & Mr A (7) Missing three I will meet in Heaven (Feb 2012), (Apr 2016) & (Jun 2020) "Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don't shoot their husbands, they just don't." -Legally Blonde |
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08-18-2017, 06:20 AM | #3 |
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 34,572
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
You need to find someone who will take time matching YOU and the RIGHT puppy - no matter what breed. Every litter has it's spectrum of personalities. Breed is a starting place, but dogs are individuals.
Case in point, we now have four kittens from a litter that was born under my brother's back porch. One is very people oriented. VERY. The others are people friendly but not quite so needy. One prefers to find my oldest and hang near her while she reads. The first one would be good for a little kid who wants a kitten who 'loves' them and the other is for someone who knows that we just co-exist with cats more often than not. Yes, you can do this, BUT you better be prepared for MONTHS of work and committment. We brought home a 6 month old German Shepard when dd2 was a toddler BUT we had dogs all our lives and already had dogs in the home - so we knew what we were doing and the kids understood dogs. Cardinal rule in our house: I will never allow the dog to bite the people and I will never allow the people to mistreat the dog. Same goes with animals to each other. I have to make sure the kittens don't run the big dogs off these days I don't buy the 'the dog has to be prepared to have the toddler poke him in the eye and just lay there'. The dog has a right to protect itself and your job is to remove any NEED for them to do so. I have photos of all my kids climbing on or over my labs, shepards, etc, but I was always right there to make sure the dog really was alright with it.
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Elizabeth "Truth without love is divisive and hurtful & love without truth is anemic"--Pastor Estep Arise, cry out in the night...pour out your heart like water in the presence of the Lord; Lift up your hands to him for the lives of your children..; Lamentations 2:19 Last edited by CelticJourney; 08-18-2017 at 12:01 PM. |
08-18-2017, 09:23 AM | #4 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 8,586
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
After my first and only experience with a puppy, having a toddler and a puppy at the same time is not something I would willingly engage in. I would also consider realistically your time commitment, and how much land you have, if considering a high energy breed like a lab or boxer. I majorly under estimated when choosing our pup and its tricky sometimes. If your 8 you would want to be able to walk the dog, a larger dog would need to be meticulously leash trained, which can be very dependant on the temperament of the dog.
I'm not trying to put you off, just things I wish I had thought about more when we got our dog.
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Isabel Mama to BB, 13 S, 4 T, 2 And Miss A 27/3/2020 Always missing my 5 9/10-1/12 My new venture! www.facebook.com/dizzyknits |
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08-18-2017, 12:34 PM | #5 |
Rose Garden
Why climb a mountain? Because it's there!
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Selkirk Mountains
Posts: 52,860
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
I had a puppy and a toddler. It was fine. Puppies are a lot of work but if you can be home a lot so you can be consistent, it's worth it to have a dog that loves little kids.
We have a German Shepherd. He's gentle as a lamb with our kids (and any kids that come over) and scares the poop out of strangers. He also loves to play with the kids. He never lets then go outside without him. Training him was a piece of cake. He leaned words and commands almost instantly. We also have a lab mix. She's very good with kids, she could be a therapy dog if she wasn't so stubborn. She likes to get really dirty. She doesn't come when she's called despite really good training. She's very sweet. But she doesn't play. |
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08-18-2017, 01:38 PM | #6 |
Rosebud
"Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow." - Helen Keller
Join Date: May 2017
Location: Kansas
Posts: 100
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
Our husky is about 13 years old and she LOVES all of my kids and is generally well behaved. I have no experience with boxers or labs, so I couldn't tell you anything about those breeds.
Do keep in mind that having a puppy is just like adding another kid into the mix, so it's a lot of work (adult dogs are work too, just in different ways). But I do believe that it is good for kids to have some kind of pet while they grow up.
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LENA |
08-18-2017, 05:55 PM | #7 | |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 8,575
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
Quote:
Our local humane society offers such a program. It's amazing!
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Married mama of 6 yummy blessings = 1 college, 2 high school, 1 middle school, 1 elementary school, 1 preschool
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08-19-2017, 07:11 PM | #8 |
Rose Bouquet
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 880
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
Just picked up DS from a play date at a school friend's house, and the mom's best friend was there and we were talking about dogs (that family has 3) and adopting a puppy and the friend actually works at an animal shelter near here and knows the "dog matcher" there very well- she said she'll set up an appointment for us with her and that she's awesome and really knows what she's doing. She said the will observe us with puppy and that if they don't think it's a good match they won't let people leave with the dog. They take it very seriously. So I think that's another great lead! I feel so much better having someone recommended to me. I'll keep you posted and share a picture when we find our new puppy.
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Kate
Married to the Haitian Sensation since 2007 Mom to S, DS since October 2009 and E, DD born February 22nd, 2016 |
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08-19-2017, 07:19 PM | #9 |
Rose Garden
Why climb a mountain? Because it's there!
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Selkirk Mountains
Posts: 52,860
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
That's great!
My SIL bought a little resort in Glidden, WI. When we lived in WI we always went to Fence Lake which is just west of Minocqua. I like hearing about northern WI. Many happy memories up there. |
08-25-2017, 04:18 AM | #10 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Virginia
Posts: 11,512
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
I have actually had much better experiences adopting puppies than adult dogs. Yes puppies are a ton of work but you can shape and train a puppies behavior in a way you just cannot with an adult dog.
One thing I would suggest is to possibly consider a smaller dog. The larger dogs can bowl over small children without meaning to which can make so much chaos! Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk ---------- Post added at 07:18 AM ---------- Previous post was at 07:17 AM ---------- Oh an also most of the time when rescues say lab/boxer mix it's what most people would call a pit bull. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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Wife to David since July 2005, Mama to Genevieve born June 2006 and to Gabrielle born February 2009 |
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08-25-2017, 05:03 AM | #11 |
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 34,572
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
But don't let that rule them out entirely - my pit mix is my gentlest dog. She thought she was the mother when we brought home chicks. She is the one that the kittens played on long before we introduced them to the lab.
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Elizabeth "Truth without love is divisive and hurtful & love without truth is anemic"--Pastor Estep Arise, cry out in the night...pour out your heart like water in the presence of the Lord; Lift up your hands to him for the lives of your children..; Lamentations 2:19 |
08-25-2017, 05:41 AM | #12 |
Deactivated
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Texas
Posts: 14,962
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
Watching your thread with interest!
It sounds like you have an awesome set up,know what you're doing and since you've had golden retrievers before,you know that "high energy" is like calling the ocean "a bit deep". We got our golden when she was a year old and now,at 2.5,we are all finally beginning to enjoy her. She totally did knock over my then two year old when we first got her! And she nipped him a few times when he bothered her while she had a new bone. Now,my youngest can be all over her and she tolerates him patiently. |
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08-25-2017, 11:05 AM | #13 |
Rose Garden
An Enneagram 7 type 1/2 ENTP
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Malawi!
Posts: 6,295
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
Agree with rescues not calling pit mixes pits because of the stereotype, but wouldn't be deterred by that! I know two pits and they really are SUPER sweet dogs.
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Stacy here!
Enjoying my Complementarian marriage to Mr. Hutch since May 20, 2006 Blessed Mama of Miss H (16), Mr Big J (15), Miss T (14), Mr Little J (11), & Mr A (7) Missing three I will meet in Heaven (Feb 2012), (Apr 2016) & (Jun 2020) "Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don't shoot their husbands, they just don't." -Legally Blonde |
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09-01-2017, 07:13 PM | #14 |
Rose Bouquet
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 880
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
So..this is our new puppy! We pick him up tomorrow. 8 weeks old, male. I'm calling him a "boxador" or "labroxer" but his dad was 100% black lab, and mom is a boxer/hound mix. My sister found him for us and he's with a family now that has young kids and they said he's terrific with them. Name is still being debated I read Lucky Dog by Brandan McMilliak and it was super helpful..hoping I can use his techniques for training. Family he's with now said he often sleeps from 11 PM to 7 AM without an accident/asking to be let out so we'll see.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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Kate
Married to the Haitian Sensation since 2007 Mom to S, DS since October 2009 and E, DD born February 22nd, 2016 Last edited by KSL; 09-01-2017 at 07:18 PM. |
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09-01-2017, 07:30 PM | #15 |
Rose Garden
An Enneagram 7 type 1/2 ENTP
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Malawi!
Posts: 6,295
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Re: Adopting a puppy with a toddler and almost 8 year old
Cutie!!
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Stacy here!
Enjoying my Complementarian marriage to Mr. Hutch since May 20, 2006 Blessed Mama of Miss H (16), Mr Big J (15), Miss T (14), Mr Little J (11), & Mr A (7) Missing three I will meet in Heaven (Feb 2012), (Apr 2016) & (Jun 2020) "Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don't shoot their husbands, they just don't." -Legally Blonde |
The Following User Says Thank You to MrsHutch For This Useful Post: | KSL (09-02-2017) |
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