I made peace with Facebook.

Soliloquy · 09-28-2016, 05:40 PM

I've taken lots of Facebook breaks over the years. My life is always better during a Facebook break.

I've completely disengaged from all controversial discussions on Facebook.

But it still was sucking my life force.

I have multiple friends who deactivated completely. I didn't want to do that, although it was really tempting. I have childhood friends who I'll probably never see again on this earth. All our family is on the other side of the country.

So, I unfollowed about 98% of my Facebook friends. Including GCMs. I figured if something big happens in a GCMs life, she'll probably post about it here.

My feed is now ONLY people who are extremely close to me and far away. Plus local people that I get together with and use Facebook to make social plans.

It's awesome.

knitlove · 09-28-2016, 05:45 PM

This is what mine mainly is sprinkled with pages that update and make me happy, science and knitting stuff.

mommychem · 09-28-2016, 05:57 PM

My DH deactivated several months ago - his life is better.

I'm decreasing my time there also, which given my infrequency before, is now a quick log on and log off.

ECingMama · 09-28-2016, 06:25 PM

Do those people post often enough that you truly only see those people in your feed?

I unfollowed my adult nephew, but the rest of my family FB is so slow (it's a shared account with my husband) that I could check it once a month and see EVERYTHING in one feed in about 12 minutes from the 78 people there. So it still shows me notifications about my nephew. (He mostly posts about video games, and I'm not interested.) You would like my family FB. It's got cute pictures of my kids.

I'm sorry I was one of the people who posted yucky things during that season on FB. I'm still distraught over what happened to Veronica and others like her. I wish I hadn't posted about it so much or joined all those secret groups. They wore me out. Now I just pray for Veronica.

Also, will it be obvious to others that you've unfollowed them? I'm mostly asking because I want to know if I am still going to see your pictures when I sneak on my friend FB! There are a few people I can't get a hold of except on FB, so I have to go on there on occasion during my FB breaks.

Hermana Linda · 09-28-2016, 08:27 PM

It is not obvious that you've been unfollowed. Not only that, but you can still see them in your feed.

Soliloquy · 09-28-2016, 08:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ECingMama

Do those people post often enough that you truly only see those people in your feed?

I unfollowed my adult nephew, but the rest of my family FB is so slow (it's a shared account with my husband) that I could check it once a month and see EVERYTHING in one feed in about 12 minutes from the 78 people there. So it still shows me notifications about my nephew. (He mostly posts about video games, and I'm not interested.) You would like my family FB. It's got cute pictures of my kids.

I'm sorry I was one of the people who posted yucky things during that season on FB. I'm still distraught over what happened to Veronica and others like her. I wish I hadn't posted about it so much or joined all those secret groups. They wore me out. Now I just pray for Veronica.

Also, will it be obvious to others that you've unfollowed them? I'm mostly asking because I want to know if I am still going to see your pictures when I sneak on my friend FB! There are a few people I can't get a hold of except on FB, so I have to go on there on occasion during my FB breaks.

No need to apologize! Truly! I honestly don't remember you posting that much. That was part off the problem. My feed was so clogged that I was seeing lots of posts from people who are barely acquaintances but hardly any from people I'm close to.

Yes, I can see every new post on only a few minutes a week.

If you unfollow someone, you still show up in their feed. Unless they unfollow you.

They might notice that you never like or comment on their posts anymore.

SalH · 09-28-2016, 09:17 PM

I made myself a new, no friends, group only profile. For a parenting group I started. For gentle parenting Christians, in my home town. I had a problem with a family member though, and she was in that group also. In the end, I tried all sorts of things to keep information about myself to a minimum but at the point we had a crisis (my health started it off) I needed support and I needed to not have any leaks. I couldn't plug the leaks. It actually helped to deactivate and leave completely, because then my support came from some of those people off fb, and from church and neighbours.

Turning my life into all real life (except GCM!!!) has been amazing.

I've made peace with fb too. I may consider reactivating the group profile only for our pastors wives of the LCA group, and possibly the parenting group but that's too tricky because I have all of dh's family blocked and some are in that group.

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

mummy2boys · 09-28-2016, 09:29 PM

I have periodically deactivated FB and I've noticed the difference.

Now I am slowly going through and removing groups that I joined because they look good (and probably are, but I just don't have the time!) and really praying over the amount of "friends" and how they impact my life.

Glad to see I'm not the only one.

MrsHutch · 09-29-2016, 10:13 AM

I've done the same thing, and I love it! It isn't perfect, but so much better than it used to be.

I'm like you, I'm happier without it, but miss those few real long-distance connections I have on there when I'm on breaks.

Another option is what my DH has done, which is installing the chrome extension News Feed Eradicator, which gets rid of your news feed altogether and makes it more like old school facebook.

3PeasInAPod · 09-29-2016, 11:57 AM

Oh huh. Good info. The reason I haven't is bc so many homeschool groups/activities are communicated on fb that I can't delete my account or we'll miss out on what's going on

Sent from my SM-T530NU using Tapatalk

bliss · 09-29-2016, 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ECingMama

Do those people post often enough that you truly only see those people in your feed?

I unfollowed my adult nephew, but the rest of my family FB is so slow (it's a shared account with my husband) that I could check it once a month and see EVERYTHING in one feed in about 12 minutes from the 78 people there. So it still shows me notifications about my nephew. (He mostly posts about video games, and I'm not interested.) You would like my family FB. It's got cute pictures of my kids.

I'm sorry I was one of the people who posted yucky things during that season on FB. I'm still distraught over what happened to Veronica and others like her. I wish I hadn't posted about it so much or joined all those secret groups. They wore me out. Now I just pray for Veronica.

Also, will it be obvious to others that you've unfollowed them? I'm mostly asking because I want to know if I am still going to see your pictures when I sneak on my friend FB! There are a few people I can't get a hold of except on FB, so I have to go on there on occasion during my FB breaks.

Who is Veronica and what happened to her?

ArmsOfLove · 09-29-2016, 02:03 PM

I've unfollowed most people -- and followed the people most important to me -- that means they are at the top of my feed. I've made other changes with it that have made it much more enjoyable. It helped when I remembered that discomfort is usually an issue of boundaries. And I've made sure to set some whether the other people involved know or not.

Reva · 09-29-2016, 03:03 PM

I completely deactivated Facebook several years ago, and it was honestly one of the best things I ever did.

It really help cut down my screen time.

Ms_Dahl · 09-30-2016, 05:58 PM

I think the way you are using facebook now sounds really healthy. Good for you for finding peace with it! It's frustrating that it is required just to keep up with social things with local friends. I get that it makes things easier but not everyone has facebook.

On a side note, if you hide someone but decide you want to start seeing them show up in your feed again, do you know how to do that?

Hermana Linda · 10-01-2016, 11:37 PM

Search for them and then follow them.

Sent from my mobile device via Tapatalk

09-28-2016, 05:40 PM	#1
Soliloquy Rose Garden Why climb a mountain? Because it's there! Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Selkirk Mountains Posts: 52,860	I made peace with Facebook. I've taken lots of Facebook breaks over the years. My life is always better during a Facebook break. I've completely disengaged from all controversial discussions on Facebook. But it still was sucking my life force. I have multiple friends who deactivated completely. I didn't want to do that, although it was really tempting. I have childhood friends who I'll probably never see again on this earth. All our family is on the other side of the country. So, I unfollowed about 98% of my Facebook friends. Including GCMs. I figured if something big happens in a GCMs life, she'll probably post about it here. My feed is now ONLY people who are extremely close to me and far away. Plus local people that I get together with and use Facebook to make social plans. It's awesome.

09-28-2016, 05:45 PM	#2
knitlove Rose Garden Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Seattle area Posts: 21,260	Re: I made peace with Facebook. This is what mine mainly is sprinkled with pages that update and make me happy, science and knitting stuff. __________________ Wife to a wonderful DH for 19 years. Momma to my 29 weeker Early Bird who is thirteen and my little Wiggle Worm born 33 weeks who is nine. How do I have a teenager?! I don't feel ready for this.

09-28-2016, 05:57 PM	#3
mommychem Rose Garden Butterfly on my face :) Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Louisiana Posts: 6,955	Re: I made peace with Facebook. My DH deactivated several months ago - his life is better. I'm decreasing my time there also, which given my infrequency before, is now a quick log on and log off. __________________ Wife with 5 DC Former Chemist

09-28-2016, 06:25 PM	#4
ECingMama Rose Garden Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 16,748	Re: I made peace with Facebook. Do those people post often enough that you truly only see those people in your feed? I unfollowed my adult nephew, but the rest of my family FB is so slow (it's a shared account with my husband) that I could check it once a month and see EVERYTHING in one feed in about 12 minutes from the 78 people there. So it still shows me notifications about my nephew. (He mostly posts about video games, and I'm not interested.) You would like my family FB. It's got cute pictures of my kids. I'm sorry I was one of the people who posted yucky things during that season on FB. I'm still distraught over what happened to Veronica and others like her. I wish I hadn't posted about it so much or joined all those secret groups. They wore me out. Now I just pray for Veronica. Also, will it be obvious to others that you've unfollowed them? I'm mostly asking because I want to know if I am still going to see your pictures when I sneak on my friend FB! There are a few people I can't get a hold of except on FB, so I have to go on there on occasion during my FB breaks. __________________ ENFp Wife who is thankful to be in love....17 years Homeschooling Mom of three....15 DD dancer and 12 DS mountain biker and 5 DD calico critter and dolly mommy 12/2014 8/2015 11/2015 9/2016

09-28-2016, 08:27 PM	#5
Hermana Linda Administrator "air-mannah Leen-dah" it means Sister Linda in Spanish Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 51,848	Re: I made peace with Facebook. It is not obvious that you've been unfollowed. Not only that, but you can still see them in your feed. __________________ My pages: Why Not Train A Child? and the FB Page as well as @WhyNotTrain on Twitter Read about how my husband was Pulled From The River By God

09-28-2016, 09:17 PM	#7
SalH Rose Trellis Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Adelaide, South Australia Posts: 1,590	Re: I made peace with Facebook. I made myself a new, no friends, group only profile. For a parenting group I started. For gentle parenting Christians, in my home town. I had a problem with a family member though, and she was in that group also. In the end, I tried all sorts of things to keep information about myself to a minimum but at the point we had a crisis (my health started it off) I needed support and I needed to not have any leaks. I couldn't plug the leaks. It actually helped to deactivate and leave completely, because then my support came from some of those people off fb, and from church and neighbours. Turning my life into all real life (except GCM!!!) has been amazing. I've made peace with fb too. I may consider reactivating the group profile only for our pastors wives of the LCA group, and possibly the parenting group but that's too tricky because I have all of dh's family blocked and some are in that group. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk __________________ Sal (41) wife to Matthew (41) Home educating mummy to: DS1 (13), DS2 (11) DS3 (9), DD1 (7), DD2 (5) and DD3 (3).

09-28-2016, 09:29 PM	#8
mummy2boys Moderator in We'd Love to Meet You, Let's Talk, High Need/Spirited Children, Joyous Homekeeping, and The Cookbook Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Sydney, Australia Posts: 16,027	Re: I made peace with Facebook. I have periodically deactivated FB and I've noticed the difference. Now I am slowly going through and removing groups that I joined because they look good (and probably are, but I just don't have the time!) and really praying over the amount of "friends" and how they impact my life. Glad to see I'm not the only one. __________________ Alysia Married to the love of my life Mama to 2 wonderful boys Waiting to meet 3 in heaven 2/2005, 5/2007 & 8/2011 Striving, with God's help, to be a gentle mother each day

09-29-2016, 10:13 AM	#9
MrsHutch Rose Garden An Enneagram 7 type 1/2 ENTP Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Malawi! Posts: 6,295	Re: I made peace with Facebook. I've done the same thing, and I love it! It isn't perfect, but so much better than it used to be. I'm like you, I'm happier without it, but miss those few real long-distance connections I have on there when I'm on breaks. Another option is what my DH has done, which is installing the chrome extension News Feed Eradicator, which gets rid of your news feed altogether and makes it more like old school facebook. __________________ Stacy here! Enjoying my Complementarian marriage to Mr. Hutch since May 20, 2006 Blessed Mama of Miss H (16), Mr Big J (15), Miss T (14), Mr Little J (11), & Mr A (7) Missing three I will meet in Heaven (Feb 2012), (Apr 2016) & (Jun 2020) "Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don't shoot their husbands, they just don't." -Legally Blonde

09-29-2016, 11:57 AM	#10
3PeasInAPod Deactivated Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: pnw Posts: 8,571	Re: I made peace with Facebook. Oh huh. Good info. The reason I haven't is bc so many homeschool groups/activities are communicated on fb that I can't delete my account or we'll miss out on what's going on Sent from my SM-T530NU using Tapatalk

09-29-2016, 02:03 PM	#12
ArmsOfLove Rose Garden Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 79,607	Re: I made peace with Facebook. I've unfollowed most people -- and followed the people most important to me -- that means they are at the top of my feed. I've made other changes with it that have made it much more enjoyable. It helped when I remembered that discomfort is usually an issue of boundaries. And I've made sure to set some whether the other people involved know or not. __________________ Crystal "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time." Maya Angelou

09-29-2016, 03:03 PM	#13
Reva Rose Trellis Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 3,449	Re: I made peace with Facebook. I completely deactivated Facebook several years ago, and it was honestly one of the best things I ever did. It really help cut down my screen time. __________________ Married to my J since 2022 E 23 M 19 Forever missing my sweet R (HLHS) and the baby we never got to meet.

09-30-2016, 05:58 PM	#14
Ms_Dahl Rose Trellis Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 2,026	Re: I made peace with Facebook. I think the way you are using facebook now sounds really healthy. Good for you for finding peace with it! It's frustrating that it is required just to keep up with social things with local friends. I get that it makes things easier but not everyone has facebook. On a side note, if you hide someone but decide you want to start seeing them show up in your feed again, do you know how to do that?

10-01-2016, 11:37 PM	#15
Hermana Linda Administrator "air-mannah Leen-dah" it means Sister Linda in Spanish Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 51,848	Re: I made peace with Facebook. Search for them and then follow them. Sent from my mobile device via Tapatalk __________________ My pages: Why Not Train A Child? and the FB Page as well as @WhyNotTrain on Twitter Read about how my husband was Pulled From The River By God

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