Teaching Toddlers to Stay in Bed - Page 2

Beth1231 · 06-24-2015, 02:22 PM

Another introvert here who cannot cosleep.
Although my boys climb all over me at 6am til I give up and give them breakfast.
My mom says I'll miss it someday.
I'll take her word for it,but it seems unlikely.

LeadingThemToHim · 06-24-2015, 04:17 PM

Thank you Rita.

FlyingBlueKiwi · 06-24-2015, 05:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeadingThemToHim

Also, I'm a single mother now that my husband and I separated in March, so there is that level of stress too.

May I ask, does your 'possible ex' (for lack of a better term) share your parenting style? If not, that may change how your kids react.

LeadingThemToHim · 06-25-2015, 04:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FlyingBlueKiwi

May I ask, does your 'possible ex' (for lack of a better term) share your parenting style? If not, that may change how your kids react.

I don't know what he does with them when he has them. I try to keep conversation with him to a minimum. When we discuss parenting it is usually him letting me know he thinks I'm doing something wrong. I prefer to just avoid the fight.

FlyingBlueKiwi · 06-25-2015, 05:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeadingThemToHim

I don't know what he does with them when he has them. I try to keep conversation with him to a minimum. When we discuss parenting it is usually him letting me know he thinks I'm doing something wrong. I prefer to just avoid the fight.

Is he generally a gentle parent, or is he still a follower of the Pearls? The reason I am asking, is because how your kids react to you partially depends on how they are parented when they are with him. (To be blunt, they may test boundaries with the parent who does not constantly hit them, particularly if the other parent still hits.)

RoseOfGrace · 06-27-2015, 10:14 AM

I don't have much to add in the way of advice, but wanted to say thanks for posting this topic as we will be dealing with this issue later this year as we move our 3rd child into the other kids' room in preparation for our new baby in January (who will then take over the crib that is in our bedroom).

It was extremely validating to see so many other mommas talk about not co-sleeping. I just can't do it either and have always felt a little bad about it. I'm a high I (introvert) and desperately need some space at some point. My daughter (now 5) really likes to come in our room when she wakes up in the middle of the night, so we let her bring her blankets and pillow and either camp out on the floor next to our bed or she can snuggle up on our recliner, which I have in our room for when I'm feeding the baby. Often, she'll come snuggle next to me for a minute or two before getting in the chair, so I wake up a little, hug on her, rub her arm or leg (whatever is convenient in my sleepy state), and kiss her head. This tops off her love tank and she can go back to sleep pretty quickly. This way she feels close to us, but we still have some space. It works out well and we've been doing this for about 2 years now.

LeadingThemToHim · 06-30-2015, 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FlyingBlueKiwi

Is he generally a gentle parent, or is he still a follower of the Pearls? The reason I am asking, is because how your kids react to you partially depends on how they are parented when they are with him. (To be blunt, they may test boundaries with the parent who does not constantly hit them, particularly if the other parent still hits.)

Ah, I didn't think of this. Yes, he is a follower of the Pearls.

rjy9343 · 06-30-2015, 06:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeadingThemToHim

Ah, I didn't think of this. Yes, he is a follower of the Pearls.

In that case, you can expect a lot of testing to see if you are going to hit like he does. It is beyond frustrating, but they are looking for safety and want to know how safe you are. It helps to keep in mind that often the child most in need of love is behaving in the least lovable way.

ModestMama · 07-10-2015, 01:37 PM

I need to try this too. We are on a schedule because my hubby has to get up really early in the am and the kids always push it waaaaay past bedtime.

06-24-2015, 02:22 PM	#16
Beth1231 Deactivated Join Date: May 2006 Location: Texas Posts: 14,962	Re: Teaching Toddlers to Stay in Bed Another introvert here who cannot cosleep. Although my boys climb all over me at 6am til I give up and give them breakfast. My mom says I'll miss it someday. I'll take her word for it,but it seems unlikely.

06-24-2015, 04:17 PM	#17
LeadingThemToHim Seedling Rose Join Date: Jul 2014 Posts: 14	Re: Teaching Toddlers to Stay in Bed Thank you Rita.

06-27-2015, 10:14 AM	#21
RoseOfGrace Rose Bouquet INTJ, Married 14 yrs to INTJ hubby, DS1 10, DD 7, DS2 3, DD2 born 1-19-16, and 3 waiting for me in heaven. Join Date: Dec 2013 Location: Columbus, OH Posts: 504	Re: Teaching Toddlers to Stay in Bed I don't have much to add in the way of advice, but wanted to say thanks for posting this topic as we will be dealing with this issue later this year as we move our 3rd child into the other kids' room in preparation for our new baby in January (who will then take over the crib that is in our bedroom). It was extremely validating to see so many other mommas talk about not co-sleeping. I just can't do it either and have always felt a little bad about it. I'm a high I (introvert) and desperately need some space at some point. My daughter (now 5) really likes to come in our room when she wakes up in the middle of the night, so we let her bring her blankets and pillow and either camp out on the floor next to our bed or she can snuggle up on our recliner, which I have in our room for when I'm feeding the baby. Often, she'll come snuggle next to me for a minute or two before getting in the chair, so I wake up a little, hug on her, rub her arm or leg (whatever is convenient in my sleepy state), and kiss her head. This tops off her love tank and she can go back to sleep pretty quickly. This way she feels close to us, but we still have some space. It works out well and we've been doing this for about 2 years now.

07-10-2015, 01:37 PM	#24
ModestMama Rosebud Join Date: Jul 2015 Posts: 67	Re: Teaching Toddlers to Stay in Bed I need to try this too. We are on a schedule because my hubby has to get up really early in the am and the kids always push it waaaaay past bedtime.

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