Mama Love

ForHim · 12-08-2014, 04:27 AM

I never see my in-laws, but DD was asked to a 4-yr-old's birthday party within the family.

In general all of them are very punitive parents. There was one lady, a friend of the family, who was quite vocal about, "Don't spank the kid. I don't like that. It was an accident, kids get hurt on jumping castles." Otherwise it was the usual shouting, hitting mess.

We took a break and went for a walk around the block. When we came back, one of the little girls (family member's kid) runs up to me and gives me a huge hug. I hug her back. After that she follows me around and wants kisses and cuddles. Happily I oblige. She disappears when her mother is around, but as soon as she's gone, she's back for more.

That night my husband and I were talking. I said how sad it is that a little girl will go to a virtual stranger to get hugs and kisses which are a mother's privilege to give. How can it be okay that children are scared of their own parents and sneak around to get that little bit of affection that they so obviously need?

DH started crying. (Heck I grew up in an abusive home too). But DH had an extremely abusive alcoholic dad who pushed him off onto any relative because his mom died when he was 9. He was that little kid who was always looking for mama love, but sadly for him, those mamas were few and far between.

MariJo7 · 12-08-2014, 04:49 AM

It is sad, yes, but the good side is that you can be a blessing there. God needs you!

But really, we are supposed to reach the world for Jesus and make all people his disciples, but it looks like that even His church needs to learn so much first. Generations may be sliding away from Christianity because of the false picture that has been projected by punitive parenting and churches.

As a young mother, when I prayed for my dad's salvation, I sometimes added, like between brackets: but I'm thankful I he did not give me that "Cristian upbringing"...

ForHim · 12-08-2014, 10:55 PM

Yeah my husband's family aren't exactly Christian. Just feeling sad that there are so many of these little kids who are suffering due to their parents thinking that they ar raising them "right".

We were laughing at our daughter who sat down at one of the little tables, and started helping herself to the cake, whereas all the other kids had been warned by their parents to behave. When DD started in on her second piece of cake, all the kids at all the tables tucked in.

A little grace, a little kindness, a little love can be spread so widely and it only brings your own heart so much joy.

mommychem · 12-10-2014, 10:40 AM

It is sad. I hope we are being an example of gentle parenting even if people don't quite know what it is we're doing.
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12-08-2014, 04:27 AM	#1
ForHim Rose Bush Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 487	Mama Love I never see my in-laws, but DD was asked to a 4-yr-old's birthday party within the family. In general all of them are very punitive parents. There was one lady, a friend of the family, who was quite vocal about, "Don't spank the kid. I don't like that. It was an accident, kids get hurt on jumping castles." Otherwise it was the usual shouting, hitting mess. We took a break and went for a walk around the block. When we came back, one of the little girls (family member's kid) runs up to me and gives me a huge hug. I hug her back. After that she follows me around and wants kisses and cuddles. Happily I oblige. She disappears when her mother is around, but as soon as she's gone, she's back for more. That night my husband and I were talking. I said how sad it is that a little girl will go to a virtual stranger to get hugs and kisses which are a mother's privilege to give. How can it be okay that children are scared of their own parents and sneak around to get that little bit of affection that they so obviously need? DH started crying. (Heck I grew up in an abusive home too). But DH had an extremely abusive alcoholic dad who pushed him off onto any relative because his mom died when he was 9. He was that little kid who was always looking for mama love, but sadly for him, those mamas were few and far between. __________________ Phoenix (Aug 2012) Griffin (May 2015) Hymnsong (April 2018)

12-08-2014, 04:49 AM	#2
MariJo7 Rose Trellis Join Date: Sep 2014 Posts: 2,065	Re: Mama Love It is sad, yes, but the good side is that you can be a blessing there. God needs you! But really, we are supposed to reach the world for Jesus and make all people his disciples, but it looks like that even His church needs to learn so much first. Generations may be sliding away from Christianity because of the false picture that has been projected by punitive parenting and churches. As a young mother, when I prayed for my dad's salvation, I sometimes added, like between brackets: but I'm thankful I he did not give me that "Cristian upbringing"...

12-08-2014, 10:55 PM	#3
ForHim Rose Bush Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 487	Re: Mama Love Yeah my husband's family aren't exactly Christian. Just feeling sad that there are so many of these little kids who are suffering due to their parents thinking that they ar raising them "right". We were laughing at our daughter who sat down at one of the little tables, and started helping herself to the cake, whereas all the other kids had been warned by their parents to behave. When DD started in on her second piece of cake, all the kids at all the tables tucked in. A little grace, a little kindness, a little love can be spread so widely and it only brings your own heart so much joy. __________________ Phoenix (Aug 2012) Griffin (May 2015) Hymnsong (April 2018)

12-10-2014, 10:40 AM	#4
mommychem Rose Garden Butterfly on my face :) Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Louisiana Posts: 6,955	Re: Mama Love It is sad. I hope we are being an example of gentle parenting even if people don't quite know what it is we're doing. Posted via Mobile Device

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