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11-04-2011, 08:59 PM | #16 |
Rose Bush
You are loved.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Perth, Australia, I'm from New Zealand.
Posts: 390
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
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Mother of:4 grown children DD1 (born 88), DD2 (born 90), DD3 (born 92) and DS (born 94). DD has my first gandson (born 18).. |
11-04-2011, 09:01 PM | #17 |
Rose Garden
speak softly and carry a big coffee
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago
Posts: 34,610
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
Subbing
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~ jen wife to my first kiss mama to 13yo spreezy, 11yo jones, 5yo biggie, and our little greased lightning, 3yo ~ all born at home birth doula my waterbirth montage my etsy! "i did not want my children to love me because i had been an adequate mother, because i would never be one, this i already knew. i wanted my children to love me for the same reason i want my children themselves to be loved: because we are all irreducible, irreplaceable." -gina bria |
11-04-2011, 09:34 PM | #18 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Rainy Oregon
Posts: 8,997
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
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Shannon, INFJ (Weekday SAHM/Weekend Barista) Wielder of fine coffee and compassionate comments. Wife to my DH, graduate teaching student Francisco (ISFP), since 7/7/07 Mom by adoption to Lina, my 11-yr-old w/sensory issues and, after 4 years, 2 months, and 20 days of infertility, birth mom to 2-yr-old Baby Bird We are a DF, GF, dye-free Jesus loving family! PM me for help or encouragement with infertility issues. |
11-05-2011, 04:55 AM | #19 |
Rose Trellis
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Trying to find my bearings again in Texas.
Posts: 2,341
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
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L My princess Nisi (Jan. '06) My silver and gold Havi (April '07) My wild flower Zan (June '09)
My hon bun Loam Loam (Oct. '16) |
11-05-2011, 05:15 AM | #20 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Québec, Canada
Posts: 8,591
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
I totally need the support!
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French-Canadian / Reader / TrailRunner / T4 / INTj / Wife to S SAHM to 3 DS Z (8.5) M (6.5) and T (3.5) Adopting from China |
11-05-2011, 05:44 AM | #21 | |
Deactivated
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 379
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
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The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to WalkByFaith For This Useful Post: |
11-05-2011, 07:52 AM | #22 |
Deactivated
Beware the gorgon, she's having a bad hair day
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: DFW area
Posts: 54,024
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
I need to be here.
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11-05-2011, 08:06 AM | #23 | |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 4,782
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
Quote:
this thread is helping me so much right now
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~ judith blessed with a creative, encouraging man of God for my husband since October 2001 blessed with a delightful, creative little girl since February 2008 blessed with a sweet {but sometimes fierce} empathetic little girl since April 2010 word on the street is I am an ENFP For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. |
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The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to filmgirl2911 For This Useful Post: |
11-05-2011, 08:08 AM | #24 | |
Deactivated
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 379
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
Quote:
Me too. But then I feel selfish if I take that time for me. I feel like I'm "failing" at being mom, even though deep down, I know I can't be Supermom. *sigh* So with my older two (almost 9 and 7) if they do something that makes me feel frustrated and like I'm going to yell, I ask them to go hang out in their room and kind of think about the situation. It gives me a chance to cool down and gives them a chance to think about what happened and maybe what they could have done instead. It's not meant as a punishment by any means, but gives them a chance to take responsibility for what happened. Then I can go in there with a level head and we talk about it a little bit. I've realized that it's a good solution for not just me and my yelling, but for the kids. They don't get defensive and no ones upset or angry by the time I get in there to talk. Last edited by WalkByFaith; 11-05-2011 at 08:53 AM. |
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11-05-2011, 09:10 AM | #25 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 8,812
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
Thank you for starting this thread.
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11-05-2011, 09:15 AM | #26 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In my sparkly place
Posts: 15,140
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
I've been yelling entirely too much lately. I know some of it is stress and hormones, but I still need to be the adult and not yell. And somehow, my middle child is the one that has been the brunt of the yelling more than the others. I HATED when my dad would yell when I was a kid, and now I do the same thing.
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Karen 4 Wielder of the Sparkly Pencil of Sneak-Attack Silliness. Flowery Sunshine Power Woman
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The Following User Says they are praying for kwisie: | swimming with sharks (11-05-2011) |
11-05-2011, 09:32 AM | #27 | |
Deactivated
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 379
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
Quote:
*hugs* I have one child that gets the brunt of it, too. It makes a person feel terrible, but hopefully we'll learn some new techniques to help! Hang in there! |
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The Following User Says Thank You to WalkByFaith For This Useful Post: | kwisie (11-05-2011) |
11-05-2011, 09:36 AM | #28 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: ..
Posts: 10,737
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
I'm yelling too much lately. There keeps being more to do with more kids so when the olders want me to do stuff for them they can do for themselves or make it harder for me to help them, I'm just fed up. Dd1 just expected me to go into the kitchen to help her put on her underwear, after she asked me to find them for her and disappeared before I could give them to her.
I really need to just consistently stand up for myself in not doing more than I should be doing. The yelling doesn't help, but it just keeps building up and finding its way out of me. In my perfect world, my kids would carefully contemplate themselves whether they want me to do something or need me to do something before asking me to sort it out for them because they know I'm already so overwhelmed trying to balance everyone's needs and they just wouldn't want me to have to put their requests through my poorly functioning priorities sorter, and certainly not repeatedly after I said "no" and weighed down with whining.
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DS (12), DD (10), DD2 (7) And my kids were going to behave perfectly all the time and if they didn't, they'd be Dobsoned, but I was going to Dobson so perfectly that they'd know not to slip up but once or twice because I was going to be sooooooo consistent and awesome and wise. |
The Following User Says Thank You to ThreeKids For This Useful Post: | Peridot (12-07-2011) |
11-05-2011, 09:36 AM | #29 | |
Rose Garden
Why climb a mountain? Because it's there!
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Selkirk Mountains
Posts: 52,860
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
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The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Soliloquy For This Useful Post: | GraceFirst (11-05-2011), justbreathe (11-10-2011) |
11-05-2011, 09:50 AM | #30 | |
Rose Bush
Five Generations of Ladies <3
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Indiana
Posts: 335
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
Quote:
---------- Post added at 11:45 AM ---------- Previous post was at 11:43 AM ---------- This is me. Spitting image of my father, the yeller. Thanks for this thread, I need it. I'm also reading Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline and it is helping a lot. I think I'll have to read it 100 more times to catch all the wonderful info in there. It's so hard changing thoughts/behaviors that are at the core of who I am. But and I'm learning to take baby steps.
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Jessica (ISFJ) Married to John 6/18/05 Mama to Julia Faith 9/30/07 Jenna Hope 12/16/09 James Anthony & John Michael 4/4/13
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The Following User Says Thank You to jmom1984 For This Useful Post: | Elora (11-07-2011) |
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