I need a routine and a way to keep it

[marbles]

I need routine and rhythm. I need it for my own mental health, I've lost the last rhythm we found and I feel like I'm floating. The kids need it, especially DC, they need to be able to point to something and see what coming next. I've found they really need that physical, tactile schedule. They do well when I write things down, even though they can't read it. I've tried doing a control journal, FlyLady style, but I couldn't ever get something that lasted. It never seemed complete, I was always frustrated that not everything had its place. Anything on the computer or phone is useless to me, it doesn't have any weight in my life. We are flexible people, and I'm not good at holding to specific times, but I really feel like our family needs something to guide us, a routine to hold onto. I keep picking up chores for the kids and dropping them, thinking of a good idea but never implementing it. It's a weird contradiction that I crave and need routine, but I sort of panic at the idea of scheduling my time and restricting myself so I need some kind of middle ground. Tell me about your routine/schedule and how you keep to it.

[mommychem]

Especially since we are moving this weekend and can make a fresh start (I hope).

[RiverRock]

Would a daily to-do list work for you? Making the to-do list could be a part of your morning or evening routine. For example: every morning sit with a cup of coffee and write the lists for the day.

You can make a list for yourself and for each of your children. If you have a working master copy of occasional jobs you can refer to that. If you have daily jobs/tasks for everyone, you can make photo copies of those lists with spaces to add new items if that's a possibility for that day.

[bec28]

I feel just like you do OP, right down to realizing the need for a schedule and somehow hating the idea of it. We had a schedule that worked well, but then baby number three was born and that's all been thrown into chaos. It's been 4 weeks and the kids are so bored and unguided that I can see we need to try to get some sort of routine again, even if it's completely different then wheat we did before.

All that to say, I'll be following along

[marbles]

Originally Posted by RiverRock

Would a daily to-do list work for you? Making the to-do list could be a part of your morning or evening routine. For example: every morning sit with a cup of coffee and write the lists for the day.

You can make a list for yourself and for each of your children. If you have a working master copy of occasional jobs you can refer to that. If you have daily jobs/tasks for everyone, you can make photo copies of those lists with spaces to add new items if that's a possibility for that day.

I've done that, it's sort of th FlyLady way, and it worked for a time but I found I needed a bigger picture too. I like the day to day-ness but I've always been one to prefer seeing the whole month at a time rather than a week. Is there a way to have a Master Schedule For All Times and have a fill in the blank every day plan? Otherwise I wander without direction.

[rdsmommy]

I could have written your post. I feel the same way about needing a routine, but having a timed schedule is super stressful to me. I like the idea of a to do list but I need to make sure it actually gets written. I remember one of the DYT videos Marcie talks about writing down chores and putting them in a fish bowl and then just picking one out whenever she had time to do something. I really like that idea but have yet to actually try it.

[Michele123]

Instead of a timed schedule, what about just an order. After we get up, we get dressed, the breakfast, then clean kitchen, then read stories, the go outside, then have lunch, etc. ?


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[ReadingMommy]

Right now, I have a routine that is working for me better than anything else ever has. It's not perfect, but it's a huge improvement! I have developed "clusters" of activities that go together in my mind, and I am solidifying these things by just doing them together every day and developing that habit. So, for example, in the morning, these things all go together:

-Unload dishwasher
-Begin preparing breakfast
-Reload dishwasher as I'm making food and after we eat
-Start a load of laundry

At night we have:

-Dinner
-Kids must pick up their mess around the house, but if we are short on time, we prioritize the living room
-Dishes are done simultaneously with meal prep, and right after
-Sweeping main living areas

Other than this, I just try to keep laundry going as needed, or load dishes during the day hours if I have a chance, or get the kids to pick up as we go about our day, but it's not a huge deal if we are busy because my daily morning and evening clusters take care of most of it.

The bathroom and other cleaning projects get done on weekends and/or when we have company.

[BestLaidPlans]

I feel similarly to you. I like organization and routine, but if it gets TOO detailed, I rebel because I want to be flexible. For example, if I make a menu, I don't attach days to it because I want to go by what I'm in the mood for. But housework can't always be so flexible. Sigh.