Snapchat?

[kiloyd]

I don't like it and have not let my son have it but now his NJROTC team wants to use it for communication. I don't know why they can't just text message!

He's in 11th grade. And I have said that my kids may not have it until they are adults. I hate for him to be the only one in the group that can't group message that way.

He would disable the GPS on it.

[Virginia]

I do not like Snapchat for teenagers (I have Snapchat). At all.

I don’t like that pictures and messages disappear after one sends them. I don’t like that when I’m clicking through stories, I sometimes see inappropriate things I don’t want to. And unlike Facebook, I can’t just “unfollow but stay friends with” people. Also, many teenagers use Snap for super inappropriate things because the picture does disappear. So they think it’s safe to send certain types of pics even though they might never do so via texting.

Also, lots of drama ensues based on people’s snap stories, and kids sometimes get obsessed with maintaining a “streak” with someone.

The kids can use a group message or group message app to communicate.


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[kiloyd]

These are the reasons I don't like it.

DS said they sent out a text and people didn't respond. So they think they'll respond in Snapchat? Whoever is the leader, probably a senior, asked for a show of hands of how had FB, who had Instagram, or Snapchat. Ds has FB and Instagram. Figuring out what to do about this Snapchat. I do not like it.

[Virginia]

Originally Posted by kiloyd

These are the reasons I don't like it.



DS said they sent out a text and people didn't respond. So they think they'll respond in Snapchat? Whoever is the leader, probably a senior, asked for a show of hands of how had FB, who had Instagram, or Snapchat. Ds has FB and Instagram. Figuring out what to do about this Snapchat. I do not like it.

I don’t get it. Why would they want to use Snap instead? All the stuff they say will get deleted in 24 hours... what is the purpose of this group chat/text? You mentioned NJROTC. So is it just social? Or will the “leader” be using this to keep members informed about dates or times or announcements?


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[JessicaTX]

there are great apps out there to send mass messages that don't disappear after 24 hours or a single viewing. perhaps you could recommend he use one of those instead.
I think my kids youth pastor has like 3 different apps to convey information through

[HadassahSukkot]

Whatsapp would be better for what they want, or Facebook Messenger. It's not reasonable to expect everyone to be on snapchat with all the sexting and revenge porn issues surrounding the platform.

[kiloyd]

Originally Posted by Virginia

I don’t get it. Why would they want to use Snap instead? All the stuff they say will get deleted in 24 hours... what is the purpose of this group chat/text? You mentioned NJROTC. So is it just social? Or will the “leader” be using this to keep members informed about dates or times or announcements?


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That's what I'm thinking.

---------- Post added at 12:17 PM ---------- Previous post was at 12:16 PM ----------

Originally Posted by 2sunshines

I absolutely agree with you and for that very same reason my teens (grades 9 and 11) are not allowed to have snapchat.

HOWEVER, we are also constantly in the very same quandry as you and quite frankly it's not quite as simple as suggesting the groups use a different app to message. For some reason, whether or not it's logical or the best choice, snapchat is what kids are using for the group chats. And not even for bad reasons. In fact my daughter can't participate in her high school Christian fellowship group chat because it's on snapchat (unofficially, just all the kids in the group).

So far we've continued to say no. And quite frankly, it's just discluded them from these groups because realistically this is the app the kids are using. It's been ok. But It's an issue that constantly has to be revisited for us because it continues to come up.

We currently allow text, fb, and instagram for our high schoolers.

Last night ds (gr 11) asked again about snapchat because he joined a bball league and the kids use it to communicate.

I'm actually starting to debate allowing the kids to have it but limit it to the specific approved group conversations. I don't know... So glad you brought it up.

[expatmom]

It's how teens communicate now. It's a reality. My teens have it, know some kids use it stupidly, sometimes delete it, and mostly use it responsibly. We talk about it and social media use in general a lot. Focussing on our relationship and openness is my approach rather then banning particular apps.

[Virginia]

One can focus on relationships and openness and also ban apps or other technology; the two are not mutually exclusive. It’s not an either/or


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[2sunshines]

I agree. And learning that line is SO SO SO difficult.

Also, it's important to remember that if kids want to hide and do things they can find a way to do it regardless of what boundaries and bans you make.

Parenting teens is HARD HARD HARD. So much easier when they were little and it was a matter of feeding and changing and cuddling.

[kiloyd]

Originally Posted by 2sunshines

Parenting teens is HARD HARD HARD. So much easier when they were little and it was a matter of feeding and changing and cuddling.

Yes yes yes!!

[JoannaV]

I guess it's good for people who have digital hoarding issues? (I still struggle with this though - I grew up in a house without TV and my sister is only just out of high school so I struggle to understand anything that so heavily requires people to have constant access to data, internet, multiple applications, etc. As far as I know my sister hasn't suffered due to low technology access, and her absence from any social media is choice driven. But. I still think it's good for people to advocate for ways to ensure those few teens still living in an analogue world can still access essential communication and some social interaction.)

[Soliloquy]

Originally Posted by 2sunshines

I agree. And learning that line is SO SO SO difficult.

Also, it's important to remember that if kids want to hide and do things they can find a way to do it regardless of what boundaries and bans you make.

Parenting teens is HARD HARD HARD. So much easier when they were little and it was a matter of feeding and changing and cuddling.

I laugh about the hiding if they really want to. When I was a kid we had land lines and pen and paper. There was no record of my phone calls or even caller ID! My parents had no idea who I talked to on the phone.

I find it odd that ROTC world use such a silly app for something relatively important like communicating schedules and meeting times. The whole point of it, it would seem, would be to streamline communication while still keeping a record. Facebook is much better for that because a closed group page has a calendar and will automatically send everyone reminders. Any scheduling conflicts can be discussed, etc.

[kiloyd]

Originally Posted by Soliloquy

I laugh about the hiding if they really want to. When I was a kid we had land lines and pen and paper. There was no record of my phone calls or even caller ID! My parents had no idea who I talked to on the phone.

I find it odd that ROTC world use such a silly app for something relatively important like communicating schedules and meeting times. The whole point of it, it would seem, would be to streamline communication while still keeping a record. Facebook is much better for that because a closed group page has a calendar and will automatically send everyone reminders. Any scheduling conflicts can be discussed, etc.

---------- Post added at 06:13 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:07 PM ----------

Originally Posted by SonshineMama

When it Comes down to it, it’s really up To our children and God. We must “raise our Children In The way they must go” but ultimately it’s between them and God.

When I get scared and try to Control Them, I preach this to
Myself.

I need to preach this to myself too.

[Virginia]

Originally Posted by Soliloquy

I laugh about the hiding if they really want to. When I was a kid we had land lines and pen and paper. There was no record of my phone calls or even caller ID! My parents had no idea who I talked to on the phone.



I find it odd that ROTC world use such a silly app for something relatively important like communicating schedules and meeting times. The whole point of it, it would seem, would be to streamline communication while still keeping a record. Facebook is much better for that because a closed group page has a calendar and will automatically send everyone reminders. Any scheduling conflicts can be discussed, etc.

For me, it’s not so much about hiding but about being prematurely or inadvertently exposed to things because of the way Snapchat stories work. Like, I am an adult, and I have still seen things on my own friends’ Snapchat stories that I didn’t want to see
People can also send you a “private snap,” and you don’t know what it is until you open it. So it could be an unsavory photo.

So yeah, maybe we could hide behind landlines and handwritten notes, but I couldn’t sext or receive unsavory photos on a piece of notebook paper or landline...and once I see something, I am the kind of person who can’t unsee it.

I don’t think as many teens have Facebook nowadays They seem to think it’s mostly for “us old people” haha.

I agree that using Snap for ROTC just seems really silly and unwise. I get that it’s fun. But it isn’t the best choice for communication, imo.

I do think if a parent is going to let a kid get Instagram or Snapchat, they should also create an account so they really understand how it works


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