Gentle Christian Mothers Community
 
Random Quotes from Wise Mamas

~* Please help keep GCM free by using our
Amazon.com affiliate link. Thank you! *~


Go Back   Gentle Christian Mothers Community > Specific Issues > Gentle Discipline *Public* > GD Info and FAQs *Public*
Forgot Password? Join Us!

GD Info and FAQs *Public* The new home for most of the GD stickies. :)

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 04-12-2011, 01:47 PM   #16
GentleMomof4
Rose Trellis
 
My sweet C turns 19 this year!!
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 2,360
GentleMomof4 has a reputation beyond reputeGentleMomof4 has a reputation beyond reputeGentleMomof4 has a reputation beyond reputeGentleMomof4 has a reputation beyond reputeGentleMomof4 has a reputation beyond reputeGentleMomof4 has a reputation beyond reputeGentleMomof4 has a reputation beyond reputeGentleMomof4 has a reputation beyond reputeGentleMomof4 has a reputation beyond reputeGentleMomof4 has a reputation beyond reputeGentleMomof4 has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: I'm Learning-can you help me? ("Time-out")

I really needed to read this. It gives me something to share with DH that I think he will "get" and gives me tools to use. Plus, it's a great reminder when I'm getting overwhelmed.

What would you do if this were an outdoor playdate? Or even an outdoor outing with siblings (my kids don't generally fight with other children, just with each other .) How do you allow them their own space without ignoring the other children?
__________________
~Staci~
Married to Mr. NASCAR
C - 18, K - 17, T - 9, , & S - 6
Holder of The Chalice of Reading Endurance
GentleMomof4 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-12-2011, 02:00 PM   #17
RedPetals
Climbing Rose
 
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: PNW
Posts: 1,265
RedPetals has a brilliant futureRedPetals has a brilliant futureRedPetals has a brilliant futureRedPetals has a brilliant futureRedPetals has a brilliant futureRedPetals has a brilliant futureRedPetals has a brilliant futureRedPetals has a brilliant futureRedPetals has a brilliant futureRedPetals has a brilliant futureRedPetals has a brilliant future
Default Re: I'm Learning-can you help me? ("Time-out")

Quote:
Originally Posted by Calee View Post
OK, I know that we don't "do" time-out at GCM But I'm wondering if what I am currently doing is considered traditional time-out, and if so, what I could do differently.

I know the basics-I don't do "naughty" spots or one minute per year or anything like that.

For instance- the other day we had another family over who has several children. My son (3 in a few days) began hitting, screaming at, and taking toys from one of the little girls. I took him back to his room and sat with him until he calmed down. I told him that he may not hit, scream at or snatch toys from the other children. He said "ok mommy". I asked if he was ready to go play again and follow those instructions and he said no. I told him he needed to stay in his room until he was ready. He said ok and hopped down (we were sitting on the bed together) and started playing in his room. I left. A little while later he came out.

Is that too much? Too little? I am coming out of a very punitive church/mindset/FOO, and am trying so hard to find a not-punitive and not-permissive-niche....that perfect place that is NEITHER of those. It's really hard for me and I second guess myself constantly.
Sounds perfect to me! HE was the one who decided he wasn't ready to go back out. That is totally fine. It seems like a punitive parent may have even *forced* him to rejoin the other children and then punished if he couldn't control himself.
__________________
Carla

Wife to my best friend since 2002

Mama to The Goose since February 2010 and Bubs June 2012

Compiler of Concise yet Thorough Summaries

Gluten, Egg & Dairy Free

Bibs & BabyLegs in my shop!
RedPetals is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-01-2013, 11:38 AM   #18
littleplum
Guest
 
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: I'm Learning-can you help me? ("Time-out")

Quote:
Originally Posted by 3boysforme View Post
To me, what you did is not exactly time out. You removed him from a situation in which he was harming others, and helped him to calm down until he could return and play nicely. I think you did a good job!

A lot of moms here do a comfort corner, I think they are great ideas. I only don't have one because of lack of space. But the general idea is that the comfort corner is somewhere for them to go when they are overwhelmed or angry, and calm themselves. I think there is a sticky if you want to look at it and get some ideas.
We have a Comfort Couch just for this purpose. It's a little barely two seater love seat that is outside of the seating area of our living room. It's near the front window, so we can sit there together and look at birds and trees and clouds and calm down. There's a bird feeder right outside the window to draw hungry birds to watch, and I hung some prisms in the windows and sometimes I set one spinning and we watch it until it stops.

Sometimes I need it as much as my two year old!
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-01-2013, 09:07 PM   #19
Joyanne
Deactivated
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 279
Joyanne is a glorious beacon of lightJoyanne is a glorious beacon of lightJoyanne is a glorious beacon of lightJoyanne is a glorious beacon of lightJoyanne is a glorious beacon of lightJoyanne is a glorious beacon of light
Default Re: I'm Learning-can you help me? ("Time-out")

For us, we do 'if you can't control yourself, come sit by Mommy'. They will come to me, and sit beside me until they (and I) feel they can control themselves again. Great thing is, I can do that at the park, the store, home, church, etc.

I don't consider it time out, b/c I don't do '4 minutes b/c you're 4 years old' etc. And I don't send them off to their room or a certain stool etc. I just want them to settle down and choose to 'treat others the way you want to be treated'.

I always found it ridiculous to say 'You did X, now go sit for 4 min.' It's like they can do whatever, as long as they're willing to 'serve their time' in the time out spot etc.
In Christ,
Joy
Joyanne is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:25 AM.


A variety of opinions and ideas are shared on GCM. Personal experiences, suggestions, and tips found here are in no way intended to substitute for medical counsel from a healthcare professional. Always use your own good judgement and seek professional advice when in doubt about a health concern.

Amazon.com affiliate link

Copyright 1997-2017 by Gentle Christian Mothers™
An alternative-minded, evangelical Christian community supporting attachment parenting and natural living.

Do not post content elsewhere.
http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/community/

Some smilies created and copyrighted by Mazeguy.
Some smilies and avatars created and copyrighted by flowermama and children -- do not use elsewhere.

Soli Deo Gloria
To God only wise, be glory through Jesus Christ for ever. Amen. ~ Romans 16:27 (KJV)

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.3
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.

X vBulletin 3.8.3 Debug Information
  • Page Generation 0.10769 seconds
  • Memory Usage 7,637KB
  • Queries Executed 14 (?)
More Information
Template Usage:
  • (1)SHOWTHREAD
  • (1)ad_footer_end
  • (1)ad_footer_start
  • (1)ad_header_end
  • (1)ad_header_logo
  • (1)ad_navbar_below
  • (1)ad_showthread_beforeqr
  • (1)ad_showthread_firstpost
  • (1)ad_showthread_firstpost_sig
  • (1)ad_showthread_firstpost_start
  • (2)bbcode_quote
  • (1)cyb_flashimagebanners
  • (1)footer
  • (1)forumjump
  • (1)forumrules
  • (1)gobutton
  • (1)header
  • (1)headinclude
  • (1)navbar
  • (4)navbar_link
  • (60)option
  • (1)pagenav
  • (1)pagenav_curpage
  • (1)pagenav_pagelink
  • (4)post_groan_box
  • (1)post_groan_javascript
  • (1)post_groan_navbar_search
  • (4)post_thanks_box
  • (1)post_thanks_javascript
  • (1)post_thanks_navbar_search
  • (4)postbit_legacy
  • (3)postbit_onlinestatus
  • (28)postbit_reputation
  • (4)postbit_wrapper
  • (4)showthread_bookmarksite
  • (1)smqre_editor_button
  • (1)spacer_close
  • (1)spacer_open
  • (1)tagbit_wrapper 

Phrase Groups Available:
  • global
  • inlinemod
  • postbit
  • posting
  • reputationlevel
  • showthread
Included Files:
  • ./showthread.php
  • ./global.php
  • ./includes/init.php
  • ./includes/class_core.php
  • ./includes/config.php
  • ./includes/functions.php
  • ./includes/class_hook.php
  • ./includes/functions_notice.php
  • ./mobiquo/smartbanner.php
  • ./mobiquo/include/classTTConnection.php
  • ./mobiquo/smartbanner/head.inc.php
  • ./includes/functions_bigthree.php
  • ./includes/class_postbit.php
  • ./includes/class_bbcode.php
  • ./includes/functions_reputation.php
  • ./includes/adminfunctions_template.php
  • ./includes/functions_misc.php
  • ./includes/functions_post_thanks.php
  • ./includes/functions_post_groan.php 

Hooks Called:
  • init_startup
  • cache_permissions
  • fetch_threadinfo_query
  • fetch_threadinfo
  • fetch_foruminfo
  • style_fetch
  • cache_templates
  • global_start
  • parse_templates
  • fetch_musername
  • notices_check_start
  • global_setup_complete
  • showthread_start
  • template_groups
  • template_safe_functions
  • template_compile
  • showthread_getinfo
  • forumjump
  • showthread_post_start
  • showthread_query_postids
  • showthread_query
  • bbcode_fetch_tags
  • bbcode_create
  • showthread_postbit_create
  • postbit_factory
  • postbit_display_start
  • post_thanks_function_post_thanks_off_start
  • post_thanks_function_post_thanks_off_end
  • post_thanks_function_fetch_thanks_start
  • post_thanks_function_fetch_thanks_end
  • post_thanks_function_thanked_already_start
  • post_thanks_function_thanked_already_end
  • post_groan_function_post_groan_off_start
  • post_groan_function_post_groan_off_end
  • post_groan_function_fetch_groans_start
  • post_groan_function_fetch_groans_end
  • post_groan_function_groaned_already_start
  • post_groan_function_groaned_already_end
  • reputation_image
  • bbcode_parse_start
  • postbit_imicons
  • bbcode_parse_complete_precache
  • bbcode_parse_complete
  • postbit_display_complete
  • error_fetch
  • pagenav_page
  • pagenav_complete
  • tag_fetchbit_complete
  • forumrules
  • showthread_bookmarkbit
  • navbits
  • navbits_complete
  • showthread_complete