8 year old trouble

[Petie]

So, Ds is 8, he doesn't act it. He's small for his age, but his behavior is that of a 6 year old. Or at least he behaves like his siblings did at six.

Example...

He asks to watch tv. I say that the living room is messy and it needs to be picked before the tv is turned on. He responds with...

THATS NOT FAIR, I'll never get to watch tv again, you HATE ME!! I wish I was dead!!


Umm, ok, if tv is going to cause a fit, then maybe we should leave it off for today. How about you go play outside.

Can I play Ds??

No, you can earn Ds points if you straighten up the living room

(Repeat his first response)

that is how every correction or request is met.

I'm at a loss, my others outgrew this stage by now, but little man just won't pass through it.

Other things are...

Touching things in the store.

doing cartwheels, playing ninjas etc in inappropriate places. (Today it was in a store and a hospital)

refusing to go to bed when it's time.

Throwing fits about what I make for dinner.

We had thought for a while that he may have had high functioning autism. Until he was seven, he never had a meltdown like this. His meltdowns were him curling into a ball and rubbing his ear. NOW, I don't know what to think. His behavior seems like that of a much younger child.

The good behaviors are almost just as unsettling.

He likes to sit on my lap, all the time.

He still holds my hand in parking lots and stores

He still wants to ride in the carts (usually we don't allow that unless it's a car cart or we aren't picking up that much.)

My others were already separating, starting at 6 or so. He isn't. He wont hug or cuddle with daddy, but he will play with him at times. Daddy can tell him to do something 10 Times and he will ignore it, but if I say it, he will either comply or meltdown.

I don't get it and I am at a complete loss as to how to deal with this child.

[deena]

I don't know but I'm sure others do and I'm curious so I'll stick around.

[rebecuna]

My just-turned-8yo does a lot of those behaviors also. Major drama when he doesn't get his way, pushing bedtimes later and later, etc. Negotiates everything, and pretty much totally self-absorbed. I just keep pointing out to him the ways his behavior impacts others, and setting the expectation that he can't interrupt me, demand things rudely, speak disrespectfully, etc. IDK if that's helping but everything I read says that eventually they will "get" it from the constant modeling.

In terms of how he compares to his older siblings, I would just keep reminding yourself that all kids are different, and go through stages at their own pace. He's not necessarily "behind" and the comparison to his older siblings is probably something he is picking up on subconsciously. Birth order could also be coming into play.