The child who is right about everything.

[cbmk4]

The real trick is not turning a deaf ear to this child. While repeating like a robot "this is not open for debate" does get to be an easy habit, I found that it is not conducive to a real relationship and teaching good reasoning skills as the child gets older.

My 10 year old is learning to express her opinions kindly and respectfully, and I am learning that underneath her sometimes attitude is a very bright girl who thinks outside the box and is sometimes right. (She also is learning how to "let it go" when she gets stuck on wanting to have the last word.)

[shaslove]

My friends son is like this. She has to just be like, ok, L, you are right. And walk away .

[mokamoto]

Originally Posted by cbmk4

The real trick is not turning a deaf ear to this child. While repeating like a robot "this is not open for debate" does get to be an easy habit, I found that it is not conducive to a real relationship and teaching good reasoning skills as the child gets older.

My 10 year old is learning to express her opinions kindly and respectfully, and I am learning that underneath her sometimes attitude is a very bright girl who thinks outside the box and is sometimes right. (She also is learning how to "let it go" when she gets stuck on wanting to have the last word.)

My 6 year old is very creative and sensitive, not to mention tenacious! I have to remind myself sometimes that interacting in conversation is one of the most important aspects of helping him to develop his reasoning skills, even when I'm really tired!

[jame06]

Originally Posted by forty-two

I *do* engage in discussion/debate of my reasons as long as I have tolerance for it and my good humor remains intact . I hate not knowing the why behind things, especially those that affect me (that goes triple for things that affect me negatively ), and so I figure letting my dc understand why I do the things I do will allow them to see I'm not just doing it to be unreasonable , plus provide a model for decision-making. And if they have a good reason for going with their way, I'll change and go with it . (I approach the discussion of things I might change vs things I won't change differently, so they know from the get-go if I'm open to changing my mind.)

If they want to argue it past my tolerance, then I do the bean-dip, "things can be different without being wrong" thing (took *years* for my dad's lessons here to sink in , figure I better start early ) - "but I'm the parent, and so I'm going to do it my way . When you are the parent, then you can do it your way . I know it's hard ."

I am the same. I don't always bean dip. I do engage when I can explain my reasons or we are in a teachable moment. But there are times he's just in his mood to disagree for the sake of disagreeing and then its time to bean dip. Like he and his sister will have done the exact same thing and he will be adamant that she didn't do it and he did. There's no point in engaging that. And I try to see things from his perspective to gather his reasoning for his opinion. It has definitely gotten better the older he's gotten -afa being able to reason and communicate with him.

Originally Posted by runningmama

I always thought it was a firstborn thing, so interesting to read it's Susan K's youngest. My D is so much the same and he will keep on harping on it, sometimes to the point of a freakout, until I either acknowledge he's right or he is proven wrong. Sometimes I want to He is wicked smart, so that adds to it. He has gotten a bit more mellow with age and experience, unless he's super sure he's right, which is only 80% of the time now.

Mine is my 3rd born.

[Two Little Birds]

I agree that it's great to engage and teach, however as a PP stated there are many, many times when it's just about disagreeing for disagreement's sake. That's what gets me to the edge of insanity.

[Vicki_T]

Oh my goodness, I was going to post this about my 5.5yo dd! She will argue black is white It's not that our opinions differ as much as she will contradict me about things she knows nothing about - like the type of shoes her dance teacher said she needs, which was in a letter dd hadn't seen (and couldn't read even if she had)