Trial and error: Wild behavior

[Bea423]

So my boys are just turned 4 and 2 3/4 yrs old. They are so great! I'm not really sure I'd callus a discipline issue, but here it is anyway. Basically my 4 year old just discovered how to be goofy funny. You know the kind.... Really annoying sounds, dramatic body movements and extremely repetitive sounds and words... And my fun loving 2 year old thinks it's hysterical. Overall it's a sweet thing to see their relationship growing in a new way. When 2 year old gets hurt big bro starts making noises and collapsing to the floor to make him laugh hysterically .

Today though... I'm super sick and a bit tired and not in the mood to listen to that for 12 hrs. I tried to engage them in some pretend play, dinosaurs, race cars... I succeeded in a squi and octopus game ( 4 yo loves his toy squid) but basically they just wanted to be goofy all day and said straight up "we don't want our toys today". Which is fine... Accept they Couldnt calm down and were gettin out of control silly to the point of slamming doors (which I put a stop to), laughing hysterically when spoken to or making funny faces and noises when spoken to, getting hurt from roudiness and making LOTS of loud noise. I know this is age appropriate but .. I can hardly stand it! They WOULD NOT STOP and I finally almost cried I was feeling so over stimulated. After. Couple attempts to help them mellow out I finally said " if you can't play quietly than you may not play together!" And I put one in the kitchen with me with a quiet toy and 1 on the couch (open floor plan) with a toy. For about 30 minutes till my husband came home.

I'm not sure that was the right thing. It felt very time out-ish but they did have a toy to play with And after a minute I explained they weren't in trouble, it was just play alone quiet time. Is that even fair? Im kind of dreading tomorrow.

[ArmsOfLove]

sometimes young ones your kids' ages get super overstimulated. If you're not feeling well it's possible they are getting sick as well. It's crazy how energized kids can be when they are coming down with, or healing from, being sick.

The only thing I would encourage you to do different is to acknowledge your own limitations and move to separate them sooner if you really aren't up to being involved in the play or subjected to that kind of play. It's okay to make sure that your needs are met alongside theirs

---------- Post added at 12:10 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:08 AM ----------

Also, it can be very helpful, even with young children, to own how you're feeling. You can explain that you feel sick/tired/etc. and you are short tempered and it's not them, and you don't want them to think any of your feelings are their fault, but you need to keep things calm around you, etc. Even if they don't understand what that means, it's working towards teaching them courtesy and empathy

[MegMarch]

When my 4yo drives me nuts with her crazy I give her playdoh or put her in a bath. Both are good sensory experiences that help bring her down to a deal-with-able state. Perhaps something similar would help your crew?

When I need mine to bring things down a notch for my own sanity, I tell her that I'm having a really hard time and that I need a bit of quiet and calm so I can get myself ok again. She asks for the same for herself too when she needs it.

[Little Forest]

I have never had that kind of behavior exactly, but I do have a quiet and alone hour for everybody in the early afternoon because I think it does us all good!
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[MariJo7]

Perhaps you could try this:

When you are feeling OK, you could "practice" together how to care together for a teddybear or another toy that has a "headache". Not as a punishment, but as a game and as a funny little lesson in emphaty.

[camperjen]

I did my best to teach my kids that there are appropriate times to be loud and goofy and appropriate times to quiet down. We set timers and practiced being really, really loud and crazy until it beeped. Then we practiced quiet things - playing with toys, looking at books, even putting a book on the cd player to listen/watch/read. The timer went off for that one, too, but I often found that once they calmed down to the quieter version, it would stick. We practiced in a lot of ways, too - being really loud in the car, but as soon as I pulled into a parking spot, it was "quiet-polite time" to attempt to keep it to a minimum while we shopped or were in public.

It sorta worked. Sometimes it was a rousing success and at other times a dismal failure. That age - and that age gap (mine are 19 months apart) - is really hard in terms of any sort of self-control.