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11-08-2011, 07:51 AM | #91 |
Rose Garden
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
Does anyone find that when they're trying not to yell they're clenching their jaw or squeezing too tight?
I'm finding that those keep creeping up when I'm trying to take control of myself and the situation before someone gets hurt. My worst is biting and trying to get DS to take his medicine Last edited by Dovenoir; 11-08-2011 at 10:58 AM. |
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11-08-2011, 08:21 AM | #92 | |
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
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Was it Ina May or some other birth guru that encourages women in labor to relax their jaw/mouth muscles ...yeah...it helps me in other areas, not just birth |
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11-08-2011, 08:31 AM | #93 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Mar 2008
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
Another hint that works well for me (when I remember to do it ) Is to take a situation where I tend to lose my cool and draw my boundary circle closer in. So if normally it takes me 5 times to start screaming that ds1 has not put his clothes/shoes/whatever on, and I know that. So this morning when I told him to put his clothes on, I was READY to help him if I saw no progress. I saw no progress so instead of making myself crazy (ier) I said, ds1 it's time to put your clothes on, here let me help you. I helped him and it was done. No screaming, I didn't lose my cool, and it was done and went on to other things. Because we didn't get off on a bad start, he went on to do his morning work with no problems, quickly and efficiently. If we start with a fight early he's less likely to be cooperative with me and getting his work done and that *REALLY* gets me irritated!
With things that set me off IMMEDIATELY, yanking/hurting the baby, etc I have a plan for what happens when that action happens. Person who did it is put on the couch for a break. I help/nurse the baby if he's upset. We discuss making amends and hurting others and when they're calm they can go back to playing. If I KNOW what I'm going to do when it happens (and it will happen because I can not be watching them EVERY single moment of every day I feel more calm and in control of the situation when I know WHAT to do .
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11-08-2011, 09:07 AM | #94 | |
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
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11-08-2011, 09:18 AM | #95 | |
Rose Bush
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Warner Robins GA
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
Quote:
Do you have support in place for your DS? I know we opted to use our county here. We didn't want to get a label for him (nother post entirely but think this is a very personal choice for parents and what ever they choose is what is best for their little ones<3) I know one of the BIGGEST helps for me was having someone to call when I had a recurrent struggle. His early intervention staff was so helpful. And they came up with ideas that I'd have not thought of at all. This is a HUGE one for me: I yell less when I have MORE tools to guide behavior (And I think all of us feel better too, myself included) ---------- Post added at 11:18 AM ---------- Previous post was at 11:17 AM ---------- exactly!
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Annie ...like the orphan
A career student at 'God Is Still Growing Me' Techincal College Jointly enrolled at 'Amen To That' University My husband is active duty Army. We had three kids in thirty one months. Fortunately I've kept them all alive and mostly healthy Even the stressful days are blessings and/or struggles that we've overcome! The next generation of perpetually in progress humans: Darrell(Dec2006) Jonas(April2008) Katie(July2009) |
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11-08-2011, 09:23 AM | #96 | |
Rose Garden
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Join Date: Jul 2010
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
Quote:
The medicine is just a wrestling match. holding down both arms, keep head from turning, tongue from pushing out and lips from raspberrying, feet from kicking and hips from lurching. hahe.hate.hate it but hate him being in pain too. Last edited by Dovenoir; 11-08-2011 at 12:52 PM. |
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11-08-2011, 09:28 AM | #97 |
Rose Bush
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Warner Robins GA
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
Dovenoir, can you hide the medicine? I had to do that with mine for a long long time :P
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Annie ...like the orphan
A career student at 'God Is Still Growing Me' Techincal College Jointly enrolled at 'Amen To That' University My husband is active duty Army. We had three kids in thirty one months. Fortunately I've kept them all alive and mostly healthy Even the stressful days are blessings and/or struggles that we've overcome! The next generation of perpetually in progress humans: Darrell(Dec2006) Jonas(April2008) Katie(July2009) |
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11-08-2011, 09:31 AM | #98 |
Rose Garden
Dove - noir
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Cincy, OH
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
How do you hide 2 ml of zantac in anything? He doesn't take a bottle and flavoring does nothing for it.
Last edited by Dovenoir; 11-08-2011 at 10:59 AM. |
11-08-2011, 09:36 AM | #99 |
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
I've only read the first page but I'm subbing so that I remember to come back and read the rest.
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11-08-2011, 10:35 AM | #100 | |
Rose Garden
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
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11-08-2011, 10:57 AM | #101 | |
Rose Bush
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
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Annie ...like the orphan
A career student at 'God Is Still Growing Me' Techincal College Jointly enrolled at 'Amen To That' University My husband is active duty Army. We had three kids in thirty one months. Fortunately I've kept them all alive and mostly healthy Even the stressful days are blessings and/or struggles that we've overcome! The next generation of perpetually in progress humans: Darrell(Dec2006) Jonas(April2008) Katie(July2009) |
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11-08-2011, 11:03 AM | #102 |
Climbing Rose
Discipleshipmothering.wordpress.com
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
I lost my voice for a week, two weeks ago, and I can't tell you how much that helped me!!
That, and my dh, who doesn't yell, told me to try to stop (before I'm angry) and ask myself if it's really worth the anger and guilt l feel afterwards. He said he'd much rather that we have the problem of being too easy on them, and having to tighten up later, than to go too hard now and regret any damage it's caused. Sobering thoughts. In the week I lost my voice, I tried to wait for a pause in their shouting to get close to them, touch them, and say something seriously enough to get their attention. Because, there was no volume to help me be heard, my tone, choice of words, and timing had to be carefully considered.
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Website: Http://Discipleshipmothering.wordpress.com Email: Discipleship.parenting@gmail.com Last edited by joyinthejourney; 11-08-2011 at 11:07 AM. |
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11-08-2011, 11:14 AM | #103 | |
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
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So where do you even start with getting outside help? |
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11-08-2011, 11:59 AM | #104 | |
Rose Bush
Join Date: Mar 2011
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
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Even with that, being able to pick up the phone and call someone is huge. Is there a county program like babies can't wait or help me grow? You can pm me if you want ( not trying to disclose too much about locations in the public thread but services vary by area) Some places will offer advice and support even based on a child's energy level or sensory struggles.
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Annie ...like the orphan
A career student at 'God Is Still Growing Me' Techincal College Jointly enrolled at 'Amen To That' University My husband is active duty Army. We had three kids in thirty one months. Fortunately I've kept them all alive and mostly healthy Even the stressful days are blessings and/or struggles that we've overcome! The next generation of perpetually in progress humans: Darrell(Dec2006) Jonas(April2008) Katie(July2009) |
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11-08-2011, 02:48 PM | #105 |
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Re: Yelling Support Thread
Having a rough day today. Not sure why. I feel very, very tired.
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