Re: Very troubled by this sibling issue..... need some pointers
Negative behavior certainly needs to be stopped. But...
The best teaching is done when no one is angry with positive examples...showing how to play with brother, how to tickle his tummy, how to trade toys.
Teach him to read facial expressions and body language. "brother is pushing you away. That means 'stop.'" or "brother is smiling. That means he likes to play peekaboo with you."
I don't force apologies, but we talk often about how when someone is hurting, we try to help them feel better. I migh say, "Sister is crying because you pushed her over. What might help her feel better?". Possible answers are a hug or getting her fuzzy blanket.
Also, once DD2 became mobile, I told DD1 that she can play in her room with the door closed when she wants "big girl time" away from her sister. She can also sit at the kitchen table to do things like puzzles and playdough.
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