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Unprepared for Parenting (Ezzos, Pearls, Etc.) *Public* Support and information for those affected by the Ezzos, the Pearls, and other punitive and adversarial methods of child-rearing.
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23. No posts harshly dissecting parenting moments of others since we desire to humbly cultivate a heart attitude of grace and not judgment towards other mamas. We all struggle at times as parents and have much to learn, and GCM's focus is to provide tools and information for each of us to parent more effectively. Posts voicing some frustration regarding choices made by others can be okay, but it needs to be within the overall context of seeking understanding or ideas for better responses in the future.

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Old 09-18-2009, 10:38 AM   #31
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Default Re: SACH review

Rereading this and bumping as I believe I saw someone asking about it.
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Old 05-03-2012, 09:53 PM   #32
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Default Re: SACH review

I know this is an older post but I just wanted to say thank you for taking the time to write it! I found it extremely helpful!
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Old 05-08-2012, 12:23 PM   #33
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Default Re: SACH review

Wow, this has been such a helpful post to me! I read SACH last year while visiting my parents and found myself agreeing and appreciating so much of the first parts of the book. Then got to the "rod" chapters and just felt like it was a complete disconnect from what he had been saying in previous chapters! Seeing it summed up like this is so helpful in thinking back over what I read.
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Old 05-08-2012, 06:39 PM   #34
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Default Re: SACH review

Thank you for bumping it. I have taken this opportunity to sticky it.
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Old 07-26-2012, 02:03 PM   #35
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Default Re: SACH review

But what does God say? In 1 John, we read, " God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. 17In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him. 18There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love."


"You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things. Now we know that God's judgment against those who do such things is based on truth. So when you, a mere man, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God's judgment? Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God's kindness leads you toward repentance?"[/QUOTE]
romans 2:1-4^

thank you for these verses!! I've never thought about it that way!!
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Old 05-13-2013, 10:06 AM   #36
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Default Re: SACH review

Thank you for sticking this up - I need to read this when I don't have help on my laptop!
Before coming on here (and talking to SalH) I hadn't heard of the Pearls and Ezzos, but had heard of Ted Tripp. So, I think I'll focus my reading on him as he's more popular in the UK. I will be back...
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Old 05-14-2013, 02:35 AM   #37
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Default Re: SACH review

DId you see the review I linked to on fb a while ago? I've written my own twopennorth on SACH as well which I get out on special occasions if a debate with a friend calls for it.

I have it redlined and turned backwards on my shelf for future reference. Of the debating, not parenting, kind.
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Old 05-14-2013, 11:29 AM   #38
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Default Re: SACH review

Quote:
Originally Posted by SalH View Post
DId you see the review I linked to on fb a while ago? I've written my own twopennorth on SACH as well which I get out on special occasions if a debate with a friend calls for it.

I have it redlined and turned backwards on my shelf for future reference. Of the debating, not parenting, kind.
Have I linked to it? If not, please share the link.
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Old 05-14-2013, 07:37 PM   #39
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Default Re: SACH review

Not sure, I think it was Dulce de Leche's on fb... I will check.
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Old 05-15-2013, 06:48 PM   #40
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Default Re: SACH review

Quote:
Originally Posted by SalH View Post
Not sure, I think it was Dulce de Leche's on fb... I will check.
I thought you said that you had written one? Here is what I have now.
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Old 09-11-2013, 09:37 PM   #41
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I am glad I found this. Our small group leading family is big SACH fans. I needed a good break down on what it says instead of just going "oh no!" and digging my heels in against what they might say. Thank you!
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Old 06-12-2014, 09:15 PM   #42
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Default Re: SACH review

bumping for myself so I can find it later
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Old 06-12-2014, 09:19 PM   #43
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Default Re: SACH review

For the record. I believe I link to it on my blog. You could always bookmark this link.

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Old 08-13-2014, 01:13 PM   #44
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Default Re: SACH review

I was given SACH when my oldest was only about 8 months old (when he started spanking is own child, baby!). I was not well mentally at the time. I was severely depressed and my husband was very sick in the hospital for a long time. I was alone and had reached my limit but didn't have the clarity of mind to realize I needed help, badly!

Anyway, against this backdrop, I have this book telling me that the ONLY loving way to discipline (at every SINGLE act of disobedience) is by spanking. In fact SACH says that "you do not take Gods Word seriously" if you don't, and that "even if you don't understand why" or "if you are upset still do it".

That caused me to ignore my gut that said "don't do this". I have done many regretful things in my life, many shameful things, but nothing hurts me more than the fact that I spanked my innocent baby girl.

I could weep now just thinking of it. It kills me inside. I was SO close to her as a baby. She was my first, my only, just the two of us when my DH was gone. She never left my side, she was extremely attached to me. As her mom, I broke her trust. I will never forget that pain. I will never forget her brokenness when she realized her mommy, her beloved mommy who she trusted, had hit her.

Nothing comes close to the pain I feel for that. Nothing.

SACH is dressed up in biblical language but its lies, hurtful hurtful lies.

Please know how dangerous it is. In particular, for women who may be overwhelmed, depressed, etc. like I was. Its bad news. It can easily lead to abuse, once you think hitting your child is God ordered and needed. I thought I HAD to do it.

I am changed and I will NEVER ever ever ever do that again.
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Old 08-13-2014, 02:01 PM   #45
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Default Re: SACH review

Thank you for your testimony.
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