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Unprepared for Parenting (Ezzos, Pearls, Etc.) *Public* Support and information for those affected by the Ezzos, the Pearls, and other punitive and adversarial methods of child-rearing.
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23. No posts harshly dissecting parenting moments of others since we desire to humbly cultivate a heart attitude of grace and not judgment towards other mamas. We all struggle at times as parents and have much to learn, and GCM's focus is to provide tools and information for each of us to parent more effectively. Posts voicing some frustration regarding choices made by others can be okay, but it needs to be within the overall context of seeking understanding or ideas for better responses in the future.

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Old 08-02-2007, 12:12 AM   #46
ReedleBeetle
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

I forgot that my friend sais if she refused to spank her daughter at the school in front of them OR let them spank her if they thought it should happen, then she would be kicked out of school and not allowed back!!!!!
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Old 08-02-2007, 02:09 AM   #47
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

Quote:
Originally Posted by nurse_reedle
I forgot that my friend sais if she refused to spank her daughter at the school in front of them OR let them spank her if they thought it should happen, then she would be kicked out of school and not allowed back!!!!!
All the Christian schools around here, are the same...I always wonder what other people must think of Christianity, after hearing that!!! Not what I would call something you want to be known for....
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Old 08-02-2007, 03:36 AM   #48
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

Quote:
Originally Posted by Carrie in PA
Well, here's another WOW! Bliss, I'm so glad you had the courage to ask them.

If the "biblical spankers" really want to be bliblical, then what's with the glue stick? I believe those were invented in the 20th century and would not be confused with a rod.
I am guessing here, but I think they actually think that it is more biblical because they are rod-shaped. Nevermind that the Hebrew rod in the verse refers to a giant walking stick that you would use around sheep, not to literally whack a baby/toddler/preschooler with it (and that the verse doesn't refer to a child that young, either). But seriously, I think they are reading the English and saying, gee, it doesn't say paddle, it says I need a rod...and then thinking (or being told by Pearl/Ezzo) that is why people in this country used to use switches...and then living in a city or whatever, they find it more convenient to go buy gluesticks or plastic tubing than to go cut a switch from the backyard forest. It is really, really sad, because I assume then they feel righteous that see, this doesn't leave marks, so they assume there is less damage, that it's confirmation that they are being biblical and not being child abusers, etc.

I had trouble picturing this, too, until I realized that my use of craft-related glue sticks has always been "mini glue guns" that you can buy cheaply at the Dallar Store, WalMart, etc. Those are as short as the width of my palm, so I couldn't see how someone might hit with those either. But I guess the "regular" glue guns use sticks that are indeed 10-12 inches as people are referencing here. Same length as a wooden spoon that others use.

Blech...I am profoundly grateful that we moved away from my Ezzo-influenced church and lost the books in the move about the time I should have asking about and reading up on disciplining a mobile child. The feeding/sleeping stuff messed us up badly enough as it was, and this is just sick. It really, really angers me when spanking gurus insist and give reasons for using implements of any sort...IMO leading parents to use more force than they would be willing to inflict on their own hand, blinding them to just how much physical damage is being done.
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Old 08-02-2007, 05:51 AM   #49
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

That's terrible! Those poor children! I told my dh about this and he was furious (at the Pearls people not the gangsters). I love that you went to talk to the gang members, Bliss. How telling that gang members are offended by these practices!
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Old 08-02-2007, 04:58 PM   #50
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

I never understand why people who do things like this can' t figure out that whatever their child did, it can't be worse than hitting them with a gluestick or something!
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Old 08-02-2007, 05:11 PM   #51
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

Blilss--I have shared this with several people and I have pondered it for days now. First, you rock Second, this is heartbreaking and eye opening. I shared it with my mom and at first she was upset that she had that knowledge in her head So I told her that now if she encountered someone talking about this she had a story--something more than her own personal shock. She thought that was a good thing to have
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Old 10-12-2009, 03:38 PM   #52
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

. Wow, really sad that people do that to children.
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Old 10-13-2009, 07:48 AM   #53
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

I can't believe this is for real...what in the world!
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Old 10-14-2009, 01:46 AM   #54
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

Wow!

So what is it with Christian spankers that they need to spank and not leave marks? Is it an underlying fear of getting caught for spanking? Something I've always wondered.
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Old 10-14-2009, 02:21 AM   #55
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

http://www.gentlechristianmothers.co...ies/yikeso.gif

My stomach knots when I read that. How can abusing your children so it doesn't leave a mark be loving guidance? If there is no evidence, it must not have been cruel? I remember telling my father as a child that spanking is both painful and humiliating and I would not submit to it. Boy did I get it for that "sass," when it was just the truth. He told me that was the point, so it would be memorable before he spanked me. I think it was more a social statement, as it related to the school and was reported back to the school to show that action was taken to "discipline" me! But then, my folks' paradigm on disciplining children is way off. Ick, a gluestick!!! Dad used to say I was lucky he didn't make me cut my own switch! Switches leave marks, so I guess that wouldn't work if you were ashamed and needed to hide your discipline methods from the world. Poor children!!!! Amazing that this info came from a gang of all places, and that they too felt use against a child was wrong!

---------- Post added at 09:21 PM ---------- Previous post was at 09:17 PM ----------

Quote:
Originally Posted by ReedleBeetle View Post
I forgot that my friend sais if she refused to spank her daughter at the school in front of them OR let them spank her if they thought it should happen, then she would be kicked out of school and not allowed back!!!!!
That actually sounds like a blessing- to leave that school! Praying for your friends' daughter!!!
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Old 10-15-2009, 02:58 PM   #56
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mommy Piadosa View Post
the craft gluesticks that you use for a glue gun- they are about 10 inches long
they are touted by several pro spankers as the best way to spank without leaving marks.
You can get them up to 12" long and various thicknesses at just about any craft store. Pearls advocate glue sticks or plastic plumbing tubing. I've read alot of places where moms carry a long gluestick in their purse or diaper bag to spank a child when they are out and about, or just to show the child as a warning.

But to the OP, I would not have had the guts to walk up and talk to them and their response was not expected.
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Old 10-15-2009, 05:17 PM   #57
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

I am overwhelmed. My heart hurts.
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Old 10-17-2009, 06:07 AM   #58
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mommy Piadosa View Post
bliss have i ever told you that i think you are the coolest little white housewife in the world

i wonder if the thugs learned from the pearls or vice versa?

so sad!!!
Thanks for sharing Bliss...and piggybacking on mommypiadosa--I'd bet that if you ever had a problem, these guys would have your back.
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Old 10-17-2009, 06:22 AM   #59
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

I'm still trying to wrap my mind around hitting children with gluesticks.

for the gangbangers!!
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Old 10-17-2009, 07:39 AM   #60
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Default Re: Gangbangers and Gluesticks

oh wow It was here on GCM, I first learned of the gluestick discipline method a couple years ago. Before, I had NO idea parents did this...nor that parents were TAUGHT this

Dana said something interesting...did the Pearls learn this gluestick trick from the gangbangers, or did the gangbangers learn it from their parents who used this method on them when they were little Either way, it makes you stop and think about a lot of things
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